Ready For A Relationship? Ladies, Not So Fast

Relationships. They are a great thing when they are right. Two people coming together and sharing a deep, loving bond that is pure, honest, genuine and nothing short of divine – that is powerful.
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

Proof Armie Hammer and Timothée Chalamet’s Offscreen Relationship Is Even Cuter Than Their Onscreen One

Armie Hammer, Timothee ChalametYou don’t need to watch Call Me by Your Name to see the friendship that has grown between Armie Hammer and Timothée Chalamet. (Although, it definitely wouldn’t hurt.)
The two…


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Jenni Rivera’s Son Johnny Lopez Addresses His Sexuality: ”I am in a Gay Relationship”

Johnny LopezJenni Rivera’s youngest son Johnny Lopez has come out as bisexual.
The 16-year-old star shared a video of himself along with his older sister Chiquis Rivera to address the…


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Katharine McPhee Sets The Record Straight On Her Love Life & Relationship With David Foster

Katharine McPhee isn’t giving away all of her secrets, but
she is definitely giving away some. 


Access Hollywood Latest News

Teen Mum Trouble: Will Megan and Dylan’s Relationship Survive?

‘Teen Mum’ parents Megan and Dylan now have two children — but their relationship is in trouble again.
News

20 Years Of Atmosphere: Slug Describes Evolution Of His Writing & Relationship With Ant

Part 2 of DX's conversation with Slug covers how things have changed and stayed the same since "Overcast!" dropped in 1997.


HipHopDX News

R. Kelly’s Ex Alleges Slaps, Kicks & Forced Sex Plagued Abusive Relationship

More damning accusations about the singer's treatment of women.


HipHopDX News

Can Amber And Ste Maintain Their Positive Teen Mum Relationship?

‘Teen Mum’ exes Amber and Ste had a positive breakthrough during tonight’s episode — but will it last?
News

Teen Mom’s Kailyn Lowry and Javi Marroquin Break Down When Confronting the Death of Their Relationship

Kailyn LowryIs there hope for one of Teen Mom’s most unpredictable couples?
On Friday’s all-new episode of Marriage Boot Camp: Reality Stars, Kailyn Lowry and Javi Marroquin faced another…


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Ivanka Trump And Justin Trudeau Continue Their Chummy Relationship

Where’s Jared?
Fashion News, Celebrity Style and Fashion Trends – HuffPost Style
FASHION NEWS UPDATE-Visit Shoe Deals Online today for the hottest deals online for shoes!

Tyra Banks Ends Relationship From Boyfriend Erik Asla After Five Years

After five years together, Tyra
Banks and her photographer boyfriend, Erik Asla, have called it quits,
according to reports from Page Six. 


Access Hollywood Latest News

Sheila E. Talks New Album and Her Relationship With Prince

The Insider sat down with the woman known for being the late singer's sexy on-stage sidekick. She says some of their most intimate collaborations were never released.
News, reviews, interviews and more for top artists and albums – MSN Music
ADULT ENTERTAINMENT NEWS UPDATE:Gabby Love’s top pick! Click and enjoy!

Young Thug ft. Future “Relationship,” Uncle Murda ft. 50 Cent & Jeremih “On & On” & More | Daily Visuals 9.28.17

Rappers gone wild!

Well, maybe not literally but in the visuals to Young Thug’s “Relationship,” he and Future take it back to the VHS era when home camcorders captured young women doing the most and recorded the kind of behavior that they’d have a hard time explaining to their future children.

We know lots of grown women today are glad VHS players are a thing of the past.

Back on the block Uncle Murda, 50 Cent and Jeremih give some attractive young women a taste of the good life and take them on a trip to La La Land in the clip to “On & On.”

Check out the rest of today’s drops including work from Dave East featuring Chris Brown, Curren$ y & Lex Luger, and more.

YOUNG THUG FT. FUTURE – “RELATIONSHIP”

UNCLE MURDA FT. 50 CENT & JEREMIH – “ON & ON”

DAVE EAST FT. CHRIS BROWN – “PERFECT”

CURREN$ Y & LEX LUGER – “PRESSURE”

LIL YACHTY – “LADY IN YELLOW”

RUSS – “RIDE SLOW”

FORTEBOWIE – “NEVA BEEN”

SHAQISDOPE – “POWER”

SKIPP WHITMAN FT. J.W.J – “COMFORTABLE”

The post Young Thug ft. Future “Relationship,” Uncle Murda ft. 50 Cent & Jeremih “On & On” & More | Daily Visuals 9.28.17 appeared first on Hip-Hop Wired.

Hip-Hop Wired

Meghan Markle Talks Prince Harry Relationship: We’re ‘Really Happy & In Love’

Meghan Markle says she and Prince Harry are “two people who are really happy and in love.”


Access Hollywood Latest News

SZA Tells Us About The Toxic Relationship That Inspired ‘Supermodel’

SZA performs her new single “Supermodel” and reveals the inspiration behind the track as part of MTV’s Push: Artist to Watch series.
News

Everything We Know About Kendall Jenner and Blake Griffin’s Relationship

Blake Griffin, Kendall KardashianIs something going on between Kendall Jenner and Blake Griffin?
The supermodel and NBA star stepped out Wednesday night for what a source describes to E! News as a “double date”…


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Examining Simon Cowell and Mel B’s Unique Relationship on America’s Got Talent

Mel B, Simon CowellWe may not agree with their critiques, but we can all agree that there’s something unique about Mel B and Simon Cowell’s dynamic.
For the past two seasons, the duo has made up one…


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R. Kelly denies underage relationship

A 24-year-old woman is alleging she had a sexual relationship with singer R. Kelly when she was a teen.


CNN.com – RSS Channel – Entertainment

GamersGate: The World's Largest Online Game Store

Jennifer Lawrence Opens Up About Her Relationship With Darren Aronofsky

Jennifer Lawrence has opened up about her relationship with director Darren Aronofsky.


Access Hollywood Latest News

Modern Relationship Rules – Top 3 Advantages of Older Women Dating Younger Men

The modern society is evolving as modern relationship configurations come in to play. Today, traditional relationships co-exist on the same plane with unconventional relationship pairs. A very popular trend today is the concept of older women dating younger men.
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

Anna Faris offers relationship advice

Anna Faris had some words of wisdom for a caller on her podcast, and some are viewing it as insight into her marriage with Chris Pratt.


CNN.com – RSS Channel – Entertainment

GamersGate: The World's Largest Online Game Store

Get Over Your Former Love Wounds Before Entering Into a New Relationship

Have you ever suffered as a result of wounds from a previous love relationship? More often than not, people suffer some bruises from former love relationships especially when those relationships get terminated. People have been bruised and battered by life. They are left with scars. The favor you can do for yourself and the potential partner would be to hide for a while. Let your wounds be healed
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

Is Your Relationship Healthy or Toxic? You May Be Surprised

Relationships. When we were single, we talked about them, we fantasized about them, and we couldn’t wait to be in one. But… did you get in the relationship for the right reasons?
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

7 Steps To Getting Out Of A Dating Rut And Into A Relationship

People who take the time to ask themselves these questions have a better chance at finding the best match.
Divorce

Need to File for a Divorce!

Why A Failed Relationship Does Not Make You A Failure?

Often, patients speak to me about the fact that they feel like a failure, because a relationship failed. They take the fact
Divorce

Need to File for a Divorce!

Dove Cameron Gushes About Her Relationship With Thomas Doherty: ‘I’m Obsessed With Him!’

On the red carpet at the premiere for “Descendants 2” in Los Angeles, Dove Cameron talks with Access Hollywood about her relationship with Thomas Doherty. And, she spills details on the movie.
“Descendants 2” premieres on July 21 at 8/7c on Disney Channel, ABC, Freeform, Disney XD and Lifetime.


Access Hollywood Latest Videos

Ben Affleck & Lindsay Shookus Relationship Update

Ben Affleck is no longer keeping his new relationship with “Saturday Night Live” producer Lindsay Shookus under wraps after being spotted out together on a coffee date in Los Angeles. And, Paris Jackson’s recent sighting holding hands with Trevor Donovan had her denying dating rumors on social media.


Access Hollywood Latest Videos

Christina Milian Says ”It’s No One’s Business” What’s Going With Her Relationship: 7 OMG Moments From the Latest CMTU Episode

Christina Milian opened up about her relationship with her ex-boyfriend on the latest episode of Christina Milian Turned Up.

Tuesday’s episode focused a lot on the Christina, Lizzy…


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Should I Stay or Should I Go? How to Know When It’s Time to Leave a Relationship

There are actually many signs, if we pay attention. But signs or not, we might hesitate to leave a relationship out of insecurity or uncertainty. We may doubt ourselves and wonder if it’s really the right thing to do. We wonder if we should give our partner one more chance, even though we’ve already given him a hundred before that. In a bad relationship, we can lose sight of our direction, get derailed from our life, disconnected from our friends, our family, and our work, and still find ourselves struggling to make that difficult and FINAL decision… even though in our heart of hearts… we know.

The truth is, if we get quiet within ourselves, and really listen, we always know if something or someone is right for us. Not only that, we probably have known right from the start. If we remember back to when we first met, we can remember that those doubts and concerns were there in the first two or three meetings. But as time went by, we may have downplayed those concerns, covering them over with hopeful thinking. But if we are really honest with ourselves…we knew.

Don’t feel badly though, that you may have put a soft filter on the state of the relationship. You are human after all. You were giving them the benefit of the doubt. You were giving them a chance. You were “waiting and seeing.” And that is only right. You can only discover what the nature of a relationship is by being in it. However, there can come a point in a relationship where you can see that it is clearly not working. And as you realize this, there comes from deep within yourself, a seismic inner nudge that is encouraging you, showing you, reminding you, sometimes even shouting at you, that it is time to take action.

Because of the complexity of intimacy and the intricate dance of relationship, we can be confused about what to do, when to do it, or even if we should. But once realized, the sooner is the better — like before you buy a house together, or conceive a child, or change your lives so radically that it is practically impossible to back up.

It is true; it is hard to always gauge accurately when things are not working — really not working. But once you recognize that the connection is not strong enough to hold, and that the two of you are not able to work through it, then it is time to let go of the relationship.

So, instead of prolonging or procrastinating, when you finally have the courage to know what you know, and really, to know what you knew all along — then it becomes easier to have “the conversation” that really was inevitable.

I could have titled this blog When to Let Go. There is an art to life, and one of the graces of life is to know when to let go. The longer you delay, the more suffering there will be. If a relationship is really not working and has become untenable, then for everyone’s sake you need to release it. This mindful act of conscious closure then, actually becomes a gift of compassion to both of you. And, by doing so, it sets you both free to find real happiness.

Diana Lang is a spiritual teacher and author of
OPENING TO MEDITATION. www.DianaLang.com

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Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

Gwen Stefani — I Never SAID I’m in a Relationship with Blake Shelton, But … (AUDIO)

[[tmz:video id=”0_hmysmidf”]] Gwen Stefani’s trying like hell, for some reason, to make it seem like she’s not dating Blake Shelton – even though she clearly is.  Gwen was on San Diego’s Channel 933 ‘Frankie and Geena Morning Show’ Tuesday,…

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Gavin Rossdale — ‘Suspicious’ Over Gwen/Blake Relationship

Gavin Rossdale is “suspicious” over estranged wife Gwen Stefani’s story that she just became an item with Blake Shelton … our sources say he just doesn’t buy it. Sources close to Gavin tell us he smelled something was up between Gwen and Blake before…

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TMZ Celebrity News for Gossip Rumors


What Is Your Relationship Fingerprint?

This article sheds light on why people respond a certain way when dating or in a courtship. One’s history can influence one’s dating practice and perspective.
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

The 7 Most Damaging Phrases In A Relationship

Sharing relationship concerns with your spouse requires a very deft hand. Some of us are better at communicating complaints than others — only an amateur, for instance, would dare to say “you’re overreacting!” in the middle of an argument. 

But it’s always a good idea to brush up on your communication skills. Below, relationship experts share seven phrases you should nix from your vocabulary and what you should say instead. 

1. “I think you need to calm down.”  

It can feel belittling and condescending when a partner raises his voice at you. But it’s equally condescending to tell him to “just calm down” in response, said Andra Brosh, a Los Angeles-based psychologist. 

“This phrase aggravates a situation much more than it helps,” she said. “Telling someone to calm down is infantilizing and it sends the message that your partner’s feelings are intolerable to you.”

When your partner is upset, remind yourself that what he needs most in that moment is validation and compassion, Brosh said. 

“It’s better to say something like, ‘I’m so sorry you’re so upset — let’s just sit down for a minute and breathe together’ or ‘I want to understand why you’re so upset but it’s hard to understand when you yell,'” she said.

2. “You don’t ever help out with the kids.” 

If you and your partner have kids, there are going to be times where one of you feels like you’re doing more of the hands-on, day-to-day parenting. While it’s important you tell your partner she needs to step up her parenting game, don’t be blunt about it, said Detroit-based relationship coach Lisa Schmidt. 

“Rather than saying something like, ‘You don’t ever help with the kids,’  try to focus on the positive,” she said. “Tell your wife, ‘Seth just loves it when you’re there to pick him up from practice. He really lights up when he sees your car.”

Then sort out the logistics of pickups and drop-offs on a weekly basis, Schmidt suggested. “Set aside 15 minutes each Sunday to plan the week, so both parents are getting in time with the kids.” 

3. “You never listen to me.”

Actually, don’t ever use the word never. 

“It’s a way of shutting your partner out while leaving them feeling hopeless. It creates a sense of finality which leaves no room for further discussion,” Brosh said. 

Instead of saying, “You never listen to me,” for example, Brosh said it’s better to say something along the lines of, “When you’re on your cellphone during conversations I feel like you’re not listening to me,” or ‘”There are times when I’m not sure you’re really listening to me.'”

4. “Nevermind, I’ll just do it myself.” 

This phrase is just as dismissive and damaging as the example above, said Schmidt. 

“When you say ‘nevermind,’ you’re rejecting your spouse and not allowing him to listen to what you need,” she said. “But a relationship is a partnership, not a personal platform to martyr yourself. Don’t diminish the talents, input and assistance your spouse can bring to any given situation.”

Instead, say, “I could really use your help with (insert problem). That would be such a time-saver or load off my back,” Schmidt said.

5. “I’m not happy…I want a divorce.” 

If you have any interest in keeping your marriage alive, idle threats of divorce won’t fly, said Anne Crowley, an Austin, Texas-based psychologist. 

“If you don’t have plans to initiate a divorce, threats like this weaken the foundation of the relationship.  It creates uncertainty and insecurities,” she said. “If you are not happy in the marriage, it’s OK to say that.  But also think: what do I want to do about it? 

If the answer to that question is, “I want to make this marriage work,” opt for a more constructive approach — one that doesn’t include the “D” word, Crowley said. 

“It might be better to say, ‘I’d like to improve our marriage, will you go to therapy with me?'” 

6. “Is there someone else?” 

 You’re spending less and less time together, you’re rarely intimate and you began to wonder if there might be someone else in your partner’s life. While you need to address your concerns, you need to do it carefully and avoid jumping to conclusions,  said Crowley.

“Asking directly if there’s someone else is a harmful phrase because it challenges the integrity of your partner and brings trust, respect and fidelity into question.” 

Plus, the accusation will likely be met with disbelief or anger from your partner or cause her to withdraw from the conversation, Crowley said. 

“A better way to express this thought is to ask for the reassurance. Say, ‘I know things have been different between us but you and I are still in this together, right?'” she explained. “It gives your partner the opportunity to give you what you need — reassurance — instead of pushing her farther away.” 

7. “I hate it when you do that.” 

It may drive you up the wall when he leaves stray beard shavings in the sink or she seems more interested in her phone than you on date night. But try to keep your composure when you tell your partner how much it bothers you, said Schmidt.

“Couples need to be mindful of the use of words like hate — it has such a strong connotation,” she said.”Instead, reframe what you dislike to something involving praise for what really helps you out” — like cleaning up the sink or actively listening when you’ve finally managed to squeeze in a date night.

More From HuffPost: 

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Divorce – The Huffington Post

Need to File for a Divorce!

The 7 Most Damaging Phrases In A Relationship

Sharing relationship concerns with your spouse requires a very deft hand. Some of us are better at communicating complaints than others — only an amateur, for instance, would dare to say “you’re overreacting!” in the middle of an argument. 

But it’s always a good idea to brush up on your communication skills. Below, relationship experts share seven phrases you should nix from your vocabulary and what you should say instead. 

1. “I think you need to calm down.”  

It can feel belittling and condescending when a partner raises his voice at you. But it’s equally condescending to tell him to “just calm down” in response, said Andra Brosh, a Los Angeles-based psychologist. 

“This phrase aggravates a situation much more than it helps,” she said. “Telling someone to calm down is infantilizing and it sends the message that your partner’s feelings are intolerable to you.”

When your partner is upset, remind yourself that what he needs most in that moment is validation and compassion, Brosh said. 

“It’s better to say something like, ‘I’m so sorry you’re so upset — let’s just sit down for a minute and breathe together’ or ‘I want to understand why you’re so upset but it’s hard to understand when you yell,'” she said.

2. “You don’t ever help out with the kids.” 

If you and your partner have kids, there are going to be times where one of you feels like you’re doing more of the hands-on, day-to-day parenting. While it’s important you tell your partner she needs to step up her parenting game, don’t be blunt about it, said Detroit-based relationship coach Lisa Schmidt. 

“Rather than saying something like, ‘You don’t ever help with the kids,’  try to focus on the positive,” she said. “Tell your wife, ‘Seth just loves it when you’re there to pick him up from practice. He really lights up when he sees your car.”

Then sort out the logistics of pickups and drop-offs on a weekly basis, Schmidt suggested. “Set aside 15 minutes each Sunday to plan the week, so both parents are getting in time with the kids.” 

3. “You never listen to me.”

Actually, don’t ever use the word never. 

“It’s a way of shutting your partner out while leaving them feeling hopeless. It creates a sense of finality which leaves no room for further discussion,” Brosh said. 

Instead of saying, “You never listen to me,” for example, Brosh said it’s better to say something along the lines of, “When you’re on your cellphone during conversations I feel like you’re not listening to me,” or ‘”There are times when I’m not sure you’re really listening to me.'”

4. “Nevermind, I’ll just do it myself.” 

This phrase is just as dismissive and damaging as the example above, said Schmidt. 

“When you say ‘nevermind,’ you’re rejecting your spouse and not allowing him to listen to what you need,” she said. “But a relationship is a partnership, not a personal platform to martyr yourself. Don’t diminish the talents, input and assistance your spouse can bring to any given situation.”

Instead, say, “I could really use your help with (insert problem). That would be such a time-saver or load off my back,” Schmidt said.

5. “I’m not happy…I want a divorce.” 

If you have any interest in keeping your marriage alive, idle threats of divorce won’t fly, said Anne Crowley, an Austin, Texas-based psychologist. 

“If you don’t have plans to initiate a divorce, threats like this weaken the foundation of the relationship.  It creates uncertainty and insecurities,” she said. “If you are not happy in the marriage, it’s OK to say that.  But also think: what do I want to do about it? 

If the answer to that question is, “I want to make this marriage work,” opt for a more constructive approach — one that doesn’t include the “D” word, Crowley said. 

“It might be better to say, ‘I’d like to improve our marriage, will you go to therapy with me?'” 

6. “Is there someone else?” 

 You’re spending less and less time together, you’re rarely intimate and you began to wonder if there might be someone else in your partner’s life. While you need to address your concerns, you need to do it carefully and avoid jumping to conclusions,  said Crowley.

“Asking directly if there’s someone else is a harmful phrase because it challenges the integrity of your partner and brings trust, respect and fidelity into question.” 

Plus, the accusation will likely be met with disbelief or anger from your partner or cause her to withdraw from the conversation, Crowley said. 

“A better way to express this thought is to ask for the reassurance. Say, ‘I know things have been different between us but you and I are still in this together, right?'” she explained. “It gives your partner the opportunity to give you what you need — reassurance — instead of pushing her farther away.” 

7. “I hate it when you do that.” 

It may drive you up the wall when he leaves stray beard shavings in the sink or she seems more interested in her phone than you on date night. But try to keep your composure when you tell your partner how much it bothers you, said Schmidt.

“Couples need to be mindful of the use of words like hate — it has such a strong connotation,” she said.”Instead, reframe what you dislike to something involving praise for what really helps you out” — like cleaning up the sink or actively listening when you’ve finally managed to squeeze in a date night.

More From HuffPost: 

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Dr. Phil – The Huffington Post

Testimony: Vol. 1 Life & Relationship – India.Arie

India.Arie - Testimony: Vol. 1 Life & Relationship  artwork

Testimony: Vol. 1 Life & Relationship

India.Arie

Genre: R&B/Soul

Price: $ 5.99

Release Date: July 11, 2006

© ℗ 2006 Motown Records, a Division of UMG Recordings, Inc.

iTunes Store: Top Albums in R&B/Soul

Kerry Washington Weighs in on Scandal Premiere’s Steamy Olitz Relationship: “I Was Really Nervous”

Olitz shippers finally got their wishes granted in the Scandal season five premiere, as Olivia Pope (Kerry Washington) and President Fitzgerald Grant (Tony Goldwyn) were happily in love and…


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Future Opens Up About Ciara And His Relationship With Drake And Meek Mill

Whether it’s about his no. 1 album, Dirty Sprite 2, or his bad blood with his ex-fiancee Ciara, Future remains the talk of the town. The Freebandz rep is XXL’s latest cover star and opened up not only about his beef with Ciara but the feud between his two hip-hop comrades, Drake and Meek Mill.

When it comes to Ciara and her boyfriend Russell Wilson, Future claims that he does not have an issue with Wilson being around his son, but he feels Ciara does certain things in the spotlight out of spite.

“I’m telling you right now, I’m giving you two sides. Like, I’m cool with it. I’m cool with him being around him but certain situations, we all in the public eye, you can’t move around with my son a certain kind of way, you know what I’m saying? I feel like a lot of moves are just made out of just being evil, basically. Because, you know, the success of my album and you still want to make certain moves to take the spotlight off me a little bit and shed light on a negative situation. Why would you want to put light on a negative situation? Even if I didn’t care about it, the people have a way of looking at it. Why would you want to give these people an opinion on our kid? Why won’t we just let our child be a child?”

[ALSO READ: Early Sales Predictions For Drake & Future’s ‘What A Time To Be Alive’ Are In]

Fewtch also said that he never got to know Wilson, which is another gripe he has with CiCi.

“I want to be able to judge him for myself. I want to judge the nannies that’s around my child. I don’t want to pay for a nanny that I never met, that I never got a chance to interview. That’s not the life I want for my child. I want to be involved 100 percent in all decisions made. This my flesh and blood. If I don’t want him to do something, there’s supposed to [be a] compromise or we supposed to talk about it. You not supposed to just go behind my back and do it. This is my son, too.”

As for the tension between Drizzy and Meek, the “Honest” rapper said he has love for both of them but didn’t comment on their beef or Meek’s claims that Drake doesn’t write his own rhymes.

“On some real shit, I love Meek. And the Drake situation, I feel like genuinely we’ve been building a great relationship over these years. We got history together. We went on a few tours together so it was like, publicly, some things was said and it was took out of context. And even with the situation coming out, we put it all behind us, went on a sold out tour and we built from that and I feel like it’s genuine, it’s authentic and we built trust between each other. So with trust it’s just bringing us closer because in this industry, as you get bigger, I feel like you lose trust for everyone around you. You feel like the people you come in contact with, you can’t trust them. So I feel like it had to happen over years, that couldn’t happen over a few months.”

Future just dropped a joint project with Drake, What A Time To Be Alive, which is projected to sell over 500,000 copies its first week.

Filed under: News Tagged: ciara, Dirty Sprite 2, Future, Russell Wilson
Hip Hop News, Interviews and Music: Allhiphop.com

‘Once Upon A Time’ Will Explore LGBT Relationship In Season 5

An LGBT relationship is coming to ABC drama “Once Upon a Time.” 

Executive producers Edward Kitsis and Adam Horowitz revealed the information to Entertainment Weekly after a screening of the season premiere on Friday. 

“We know that community have been big supporters of the show and we would love to be able to tell a love story that reflects that,” Kitsis said. 

“It’s something we want to do this year,” Horowitz added. “It’s something we think is due and important to do on the show. This is the world we live in.”

Viewers speculate that the relationship could occur between Mulan and Aurora, but Kitsis and Horowitz did not reveal which characters the arc would feature.

Last week, Horowitz shared a script tease for the season premiere on Twitter.

For more, head over to Entertainment Weekly.  

“Once Upon a Time” premieres Sunday, Sept. 27, on ABC.

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Gay Voices – The Huffington Post

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36 Reasons How I Met Your Mother’s Marshall and Lily Have the Greatest Relationship Ever

How I Met Your Mother might not have ended the way we all wanted, but the series is still a wonderful piece of comedy, thanks in large part to the relationships forged by these beloved…


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Niko G4 Details Relationship With Dom Kennedy

Niko G4 says a performance in 2012 caught Dom Kennedy’s attention and began their relationship.


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Carly Rae Jepsen: My Relationship With My Gay Fans Is A ‘Mutual Lovefest’

Carly Rae Jepsen’s slick pop tunes have made her a favorite among gay audiences, and now, the “Call Me Maybe” songstress says the admiration is mutual.

Describing a 2013 performance at the White Party in Palm Springs, California as “one of the best times,” Jepsen, 29, tells PrideSource’s Chris Azzopardi that she lives for the energy she receives from her gay fans.  

“I’ve always felt, when we go to wherever it might be — a festival or something along the lines — it’s just a different kind of energy,” she said. “Everyone is so joyful and you feel all of that as a performer. There’s just a mutual lovefest going on for me anytime I can get in front of a crowd like that.”

Jepsen, who is currently promoting her new album, ”E*MO*TION,” said that she didn’t expect the gay twist ending of her “Call Me Maybe” video to generate the buzz that it did in 2012. 

 ”I think there was so much going on with that video and with that song that my life was sort of being flipped upside down … it was just a nice thing to hear that it was making a positive impact, but there was no intentional motive,” she said, before revealing some bad news for gay fans of the video’s hunky, shirtless star: “I’m sorry to inform you that I think he’s actually straight.” 

The Canadian-born performer also said that moving to the U.S. made her realize “how big of an issue” LGBT inequality is, and inspired her to become a staunch advocate. In 2013, she canceled a performance at the Boy Scouts of America’s National Scout Jamboree because of the organization’s controversial ban on gay participants at that time. But that’s been just the tip of her advocacy work. 

“When we got marriage equality and there was a celebration for that in New York City, it was an honor to be a part of that. I can’t explain it,” she said. “There are some performances that you do and you’re like, “That was cool, that was fun.” That one was different fun. It was so memorable and an incredible thing to be a part of.”  

To read the full PrideSource interview with Carly Rae Jepsen, head here.

Also on HuffPost:   

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The 8 Warning Signs Of An Abusive Relationship

Understand the warning signs — and resources for help — if you’re in an abusive domestic relationship.
News

Ar-Ab Talks About Relationship With Drake And Meek Mill Beef

The rumors about Philadelphia’s own, Ar-Ab signing to Drake’s OVO are back in full force!  Along with a few others, Ar-Ab has a lot of decision-making to do within the next few days. All Hip-Hop had a chance to chop it up with the infamous rapper, and according to him, there are a few offers on the table.

Ar-Ab also touched upon his relationship with Drake, a few lyrics from his Back To Back freestyle addressing Meek Mill and the Dream Chasers, and more… Let’s just say that Assault Rifle-Ab is not worried about the “beef” he was dragged into.

Check out the clip of Ar-Ab as he gives a thorough explanation below!

Filed under: Features, Videos Tagged: ar ab, beef, Meek Mill
AllHipHop

Kylie Jenner And Tyga — 18 Makes Relationship Fair Game on Reality Show (PHOTO)

Kylie Jenner and Tyga are now fair game for producers of “Keeping Up with the Kardashians” … and it took no time at all for the cameras to capture their relationship. The show didn’t really touch on the relationship, because Kylie was 17 last…

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One Way To Avoid Resentment, Anger And Frustration In A Relationship

Do you like — or even need — to be right? When you’re having a discussion with your partner or a friend, are you determined to “win”? In the video above, Dr. Phil says, “If you live like that, you’re going to have a lot of conflict, and you’re going to spend a lot of time feeling resentment, anger and frustration.”

Instead, Dr. Phil suggests that you make the decision to be happy, instead of always trying to be right. “If you make your relationship a competition, that means that there’s a winner and a loser, and nobody likes to be a loser,” he cautions. “Relationships aren’t meant to be competitions, they’re meant to be cooperations. Think about being right and ask yourself if it’s worth the trouble that you’re investing just so you can say, ‘I was right.’”

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Dr. Phil – The Huffington Post

A Good Relationship Versus A Bad Relationship In One Comic

One way to know you’re in the right relationship? Your spouse finds your little quirks and odd habits endearing rather than embarrassing. 

Cartoonist Sarah Andersen of the website Sarah’s Scribbles highlights that important distinction between a good relationship and a crappy one in the cute comic below: 

Also on HuffPost:

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Comedy – The Huffington Post
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Tupac & Madonna’s Relationship Detailed By Mopreme Shakur

Tupac’s older half-brother describe’s Pac’s relationship with Madonna and Janet Jackson.


HipHopDX News

Zayn Malik and Perrie Edwards end their relationship, according to reports

Former One Direction member Zayn Malik and Little Mix’s Perrie Edwards end their relationship, according to US and UK media reports. Helena Williams reports.


Reuters Video: Entertainment

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Kanye West And Drake’s Relationship Came Full Circle At OVO Fest 2015

Kanye West performed at Drake’s sixth annual OVO Fest concert, after making his first appearance in 2013.
News

4 Things We’ve Learned to NEVER Do in a Relationship Thanks to House Hunters

Literally everything you need to know about how passive aggression can destroy relationships can be learned from watching House Hunters and its many iterations, which we realized while viewing House Hunters International: London (currently available…


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Why ‘talking about marriage’ should not be a relationship taboo

Relationship experts Matthew Hussey and Francesca Hogi answer viewer’s questions about love and dating and share their thoughts on whether or not to combine bank accounts with your spouse and when they think a couple should “talk about marriage.”


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When Is the Right Time to Say I Love You in a New Relationship?

That feeling of being in love, when your heart is all of a flutter every time you think of him, you can’t eat or sleep properly and your every waking thought is filled with him, is a truly magical feeling. But how do you know if he is feeling the same?
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What Is Theo’s Twisted Relationship With The ‘Teen Wolf’ Dread Doctors?

What is Theo’s connection to the “Teen Wolf” Dread Doctors?
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25 Times Vanessa Hudgens And Austin Butler Gave Us Major Relationship Goals

These examples prove Vanessa Hudgens and Austin Butler are the ultimate embodiment of #RelationshipGoals.
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Trinogamous Open Sex Domestic Relationship

Three hot Aussie guys getting off on camera as Dan and Sam take control of Coz. Bottom hunk Coz remains the center of attention as he is fucked repeatedly by Dan’s massively hung cock and gets a second fuck from Sam also, before the 3 of them release with massive cum loads!

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Three hot Aussie guys getting off on camera as Dan and Sam take control of Coz. Bottom hunk Coz remains the center of attention as he is fucked repeatedly by Dan’s massively hung cock and gets a second fuck from Sam also.

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How This Woman Left A Sexless Marriage And Found Relationship Bliss

Lindsey Ellison first experienced sexual incompatibility with the man who would become her husband when she was in her mid-20s. After a largely sexless 17-year marriage, she decided to end the relationship, and now she’s in a sexually satisfying union with her husband of over a year.

Ellison, who works as a divorce coach, shared her story with HuffPost Live’s Nancy Redd on Tuesday. After struggling with intimacy, Ellison thought there could be something “hormonally wrong” with her. When a doctor found no physical problem, Ellison realized the trouble was coming from a handful of issues within her relationship.

“The sex part of it was just really an ingredient to a much larger recipe,” she said.

When she hit her mid-30s, Ellison gave herself permission to seek sexual fulfillment and decided to leave her “incredibly lonely” marriage. The key to finding the happiness she has now, Ellison said, was being up-front with her new partner from the get-go.

“When I met my [new] husband, I almost feel as though it was the second date [when] I said, ‘Hey, FYI, these are my requirements and this is my parameter, and I refuse to have a sexless marriage,'” she remembered. “I probably gave him the amount of days I expected [to have sex] because I just didn’t want to go back to that place.”

Ellison closed by offering some words of advice to other women who are newly out of a relationship:

It’s one thing if [newly single women] just — let me put it bluntly — if they just want to get laid. Go for it. I say use protection and just manage your expectations and his… If you’re coming out of a relationship where you’re feeling wounded or vulnerable, my advice is to get your love mojo back on for yourself. Worry about sex, do things by yourself, go to a sex toy store, do what you need to do, and really protect yourself because you can get hurt and get sucked back into another unhealthy relationship if you don’t really know what you’re doing. 

Watch Lindsey Ellison share her story in the video above, and click here for the full HuffPost Live conversation about sexless marriages.   

Sign up here for Live Today, HuffPost Live’s morning email that will let you know the newsmakers, celebrities and politicians joining us that day and give you the best clips from the day before.

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Divorce – The Huffington Post

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Jared Fogle and Subway — Suspending Relationship During Child Porn Investigation

Subway and Jared Fogle are parting ways — for now, at least … they’ve agreed to a mutual suspension of their relationship during the child pornography investigation. In announcing the suspension, Subway added, “Jared continues to cooperate with…

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Fourth Of July: Relationship Roundup

Splitsville for Scott and Kourtney; a new sighting for Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner post-divorce. In happier news, Ashton & Mila tie the knot!


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5 Times Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris Gave Us Major Relationship Goals

Since it's July Fourth weekend and summer is (sadly) half over, we're ready to call it: Taylor Swift and Calvin Harris are officially *the* couple of the season. And with each passing social media post,…


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Alley Boy Addresses Relationship With Master P

Alley Boy speaks on altercation in California, upcoming release of “Definition Of Fuck Shit 3” mixtape.


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Nicki Minaj Responds To Joe Budden’s Comments About Her Relationship With Meek Mill

(AllHipHop News) When Joe Budden decided to comment on Meek Mill and Nicki Minaj’s relationship during the latest episode of his podcast, he probably did not expect it would become the number one trending topic on Twitter. That happened, thanks in part to Meek and Joe exchanging words on the social media site.

[ALSO READ: Something That Looks Like Beef Breaks Out Between Budden And Meek]

Meek went back at Joe in a series of tweets which included him saying, “Yall gonna get that boy chewed,” “It ain’t that boy’s level to be commenting on the way I handle my lady,” and “Ya name ‘Ramen’ put him in the bathroom.” He also retweeted some memes making fun of Budden.

MeekMill1
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Now Nicki has responded to Joe’s podcast too. The leader of the Barbz sent out her own tweet directed at the Slaughterhouse member.

Nicki Minaj Tweet

The entire situation started after Budden said, “Meek’s music is too hard for me to look at him with this f*cking sappy f*ck sh*t. Be the hardcore guy that I’m sure she was attracted to at some point. It’s nasty. I hate everything about it.”

In fairness, the former star of Love & Hip Hop did do exactly what Nicki suggested. Budden also added, ” I do appreciate them both keeping the hope of love alive.”

[ALSO READ: Joe Budden: Meek Mill’s Music Is Too Hard For Him To Act So “Sappy” Around Nicki Minaj (AUDIO)]

Filed under: News Tagged: beef, Joe Budden, Meek Mill, Nicki Minaj
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Meek Mill Details Nicki Minaj Working Relationship

“I ain’t really into the media stuff and all that," Meek Mill says, "but that’s what comes with it because we celebrities."


HipHopDX News

Holly Madison On Her ‘Weird’ Relationship With Kendra Wilkinson

For years, Holly Madison and Kendra Wilkinson seemed to be part of a secret sisterhood. But a lot has changed since the women ended their relationships with Hugh Hefner, and the former stars of “The Girls Next Door” have opened up about what life was really like at the Playboy Mansion.

Madison and Wilkinson have been trading barbs since writing their dueling memoirs, with Wilkinson recently saying Madison published her new tell-all book, Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny, for “revenge.”

Madison has her own view. In the above clip from her upcoming interview on “Oprah: Where Are They Now?,” she discusses how her relationship with Wilkinson has changed over the years.

“Kendra’s and my relationship has definitely been weird,” Madison says in the above video. “I feel like, over the years, I’ve known like three different people.”

holly madison and kendra wilkinson

When they first met, Madison says Wilkinson “started off as this girl who seemed nice.”

In 2005, “The Girls Next Door” premiered to huge ratings on E! and Madison and Wilkinson became household names. The breakout hit focused on lives of Hefner’s then-girlfriends, Madison, Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt. For five seasons, cameras documented the drama that unfolded inside the Playboy Mansion walls.

Madison says Wilkinson changed into “this girl who’s not a girl’s girl and is very competitive and pushes away other girls.”

holly madison and kendra wilkinson

By 2009, all three women had left the mansion and ended their relationships with Hefner. Wilkinson married former wide receiver Hank Baskett in 2009 and Madison went on to marry Pasquale Rotella in 2013.

“When she met her husband she was very nice and seemed to have grown into this really different person,” Madison says.

kendra wilkinson and hank baskett

But once again, their friendship didn’t last. “And then later down the road we had a falling out, so it’s been all over the place,” she says. “I want viewers to pick up the book and read the whole story.”

Madison’s memoir, Down the Rabbit Hole: Curious Adventures and Cautionary Tales of a Former Playboy Bunny, is available now.

“Oprah: Where Are They Now?” airs Saturdays at 10 p.m. ET on OWN.

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Miley Cyrus — New Girl/Girl Relationship … Passion or PR Stunt?

Miley Cyrus’ make out session with Victoria’s Secret model Stella Maxwell was intense, but there’s some evidence this might have been brilliant guerrilla marketing. The kissing pics were snapped Tuesday night during a break from the set of a music video…

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Why Your Relationship May Be In Trouble (And How To Fix It)

The truth is that if your relationship is in trouble, it’s probably because you set it up that way. Read that sentence again: your relationship is in trouble because you set it up that way. And let me be real clear, I’m not saying that you set it up that way because you were in a bad mood once in a while. You didn’t set it up that way because of something really outrageous you did one time five months or five years ago. You set it up that way by actively, consistently, and efficiently designing, programming, and choreographing your entire lifestyle to generate and then support a bad relationship. You have chosen to live in a way in which no other result could occur.

It is not possible for you to have a seriously defective long-term relationship unless you have generated and adopted a lifestyle to sustain it. Every single person in every walk of life has a lifestyle that supports who and what he or she is. If you are a healthy, vibrant, efficient, and productive person who is in touch with your core of consciousness, then I know, without question, that you have a lifestyle that supports that manner of living. If you are emotionally pained and relationally troubled person who has lost touch with your core of consciousness, I know that you have a lifestyle that supports that too. You cannot have a bad relationship unless your lifestyle is characterized by stress, pressure, distraction, and a harried and chaotic existence. Moreover, if you are living in a dysfunctional relationship with another person, it’s because you have a dysfunctional relationship with yourself.

I’m not blaming you; I’m just telling you how it is. A bad relationship cannot exist if it is not fed and nurtured in some way. If you think I am wrong, just look out your window. If you see weeds in your yard or in the field next door, they didn’t just happen. Some way, somehow that weed had to get started. And what’s more, it had to be fed and nurtured in some way. It didn’t grow in concrete; somehow the environment had to support its very existence or it could not be.

I’m not saying you necessarily chose any environment or lifestyle consciously, and I’m not saying that you generated your dysfunctional relationship on purpose. But I’m telling you that the reality of your relationship along with your overall lifestyle and your relationship with yourself are 100 percent inextricably intertwined. If you have not designed and carried out your life to create or allow distance instead of intimacy, combativeness instead of cooperation, blame and rejection instead of accountability and acceptance, you cannot maintain the erosion and pain that you are now experiencing. Problems don’t flourish in isolation; They have to have help and nurturance.

As an example, simply compare the lifestyle of someone who is chronically and morbidly overweight with the lifestyle of someone who is fit, energetic, and of normal weight. I will promise you that both of these people have designed their worlds to sustain what they have become. The overweight person will use food differently. You will find that he or she lives to eat, while a person of normal weight eats to live. This is a painful truth, but it is the truth. When it comes to your relationship, you have chosen to live patterns of thought, feeling and behavior that have generated something that is not giving you what you want. You are living to suffer instead of loving to live. That has to change, and it has to change first before anything else will begin to fall into place.

I have no doubt that many of you at this very moment are saying, “Wait a second, Dr. Phil. All your talk about getting me straight is just great, but you have no idea what a jerk my partner can be. You have no idea what manner of hell my partner brings into my life. I’m fine about making my life better, but what about my partner? Why all this total focus on me? I’m just one-half of this deal!”

Trust me, I do know what you may well be living with, and I promise you, your partner will get his or her turn in the barrel. But in all likelihood, your partner isn’t sitting right beside you reading this. You’re the only one reading it. My only input, my only influence, is with you, so that is who I am focusing on, and if you are smart you will do the same. But I do know it takes two to tango, and if you are able to change yourself, if you are able to create a different lifestyle and environment in which your relationship takes place, if you are able to regain your own power and reclaim your right to dignity and respect, then your partner is going to be seriously affected.

You can’t control your partner. You can’t make changes for your partner. You can’t tell your partner what to do. But you can inspire your partner. You can give your partner a whole new set of behaviors and new set of stimuli to respond to. If you drop out of the destructive mind-set and vicious circle of mutually frustrating interactions that are causing your relationship to implode, if you drop out of the fight and start living a new way, it’s going to be real difficult for your partner to continue spewing and seeking venom. You can stop sabotaging yourself and your relationship, and you can start inspiring the kind of reactions you want from your partner. In the face of such constructive input, he or she can’t fight alone, argue alone, or continue to be offended. Your partner can pout for a while, perhaps withdraw and be suspicious for a while, but eventually, he or she is going to feel pretty stupid sitting over in the corner while you seem to be getting so very much happier and so much more optimistic and at peace with yourself.

Besides, what’s the alternative — to allow your current lifestyle to persist, a lifestyle that with each passing day broadens the gap between you and your hopes and dreams? This isn’t brain-surgery or quantum physics here — what you are doing, how you are living, is not working. Plain and simple, it is not working. If you do not push yourself to find out what it is in your lifestyle that isn’t working, what it is about your lifestyle that has created and supports this negative relationship, you will continue to suffer. You will continue to work on the wrong things that have nothing to do with the status of your relationship at the expense of that which most certainly determines its success or failure. You will try to believe that it’s OK to forget some of your dreams, telling yourself that at least you are “secure” and “comfortable.” You’ll find yourself relying more and more upon the language of losers, telling yourself that you know you “should” do something about your plight and that you’d like to change but that you just aren’t sure where to start. When you choose the behavior, you choose the consequences, so you must start choosing differently right here, right now.

If you are going to rescue your relationship, the first lifeline we have to throw you is to you, so that you can pull yourself out of your emotional swamp. By changing how you treat yourself, you alter the most important element of the entire equation. It means altering the environment in which your relationship exists and changing the priorities that dictate your time and energy. You must re-design the backdrop or context in which your relationship occurs. Until you begin to live with dignity, respect, and emotional integrity, you will not have that quality and level of interaction with anyone else. As I like to say, you cannot give away what you do not have. If you don’t have a pure and healthy love and regard for yourself, how can you possibly give that to anyone else? And if you can’t give it to anyone else, the how can you possibly expect to have it reciprocated?

Modified excerpt from Relationship Rescue: A Seven-Step Strategy for Reconnecting With Your Partner by Phillip C. McGraw, PhD (Hyperion).

Have a question for Dr. Phil? Ask it here!

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Nicki Minaj & Meek Mill Detail Relationship In “All Eyes On You”

Nicki Minaj wears the MMG rapper’s chain in the track’s cover art.


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A Few Quick Fixes for Your Relationship

One of my favorite articles as of late highlights the research of John Gottman. You can read Masters of Love in The Atlantic. If you want the cliff notes version, it compares successful couples with unsuccessful couples (masters vs. disasters). What the research found was that successful couples exhibit kindness and generosity towards each other while unsuccessful couples are critical and have outward contempt for each other.

Simple enough? Yes. It truly can be that simple for couples that have lost their way and possibly that spark that first connected them. If you find yourself feeling disconnected from your partner and wondering what happened to that amazing person you first fell in love with, try these tips to bring back the connection and love to your relationship:

1. Appreciations every day: Appreciating your partner is crucial to the relationship; so much so that I begin every couples session with the couple giving appreciations to each other! Unfortunately, after some time has passed in a relationship, many couples don’t verbally give appreciation. In fact, they may tell their partner what they are doing wrong instead of what they are doing right (see below for the next tip). This is totally counterproductive! Appreciations are actually conscious work. Make a point at the end of every day for you and your partner to give each other an appreciation (or two or three if you want!)

2. Tell your partner what you would like instead of telling them what they are doing wrong: Many couples like to tell their partner things like, “don’t do this, or, “I don’t like it when you ___.” Instead of keeping things negative, reframe it to a positive a”nd tell them what you would like them to do. So, instead of: “you never take out the trash,” tell them: “It’s really helpful when you take the trash out, would you mind doing that for me?” People respond much more favorably to positive statements.

3. Appreciate your partner in the moment: Did your partner do something nice or helpful? Make sure they know it! When they are aware of what they are doing that’s helpful to you and they hear it, they will want to do it more.

4. Set up a date night: Feeling disconnected? This is often a good indication that you and your partner need to get out alone and to do something you both enjoy. These are the moments where it’s important to get a babysitter (if you have kids). If money is tight, arrange to do something at home with no distractions, such as take out and Netflix.

5. Pick your battles: Figure out what’s important to you. If there are things you can let go, let it go. If it has a lot of energy and it’s hard to get past, bring it up in a constructive way instead of a critical way that might put your partner on the defense. Usually sitting on it for a while and letting your strong emotions pass before mentioning it is a good way to talk about something that is highly charged and contentious. A constructive way to talk about a topic that could bring about friction is to use “I” versus “you” statements and to avoid placing blame on someone else. For example, “I felt hurt when you were short with me last night.”

It’s OK to fight-all couples fight. It’s about how you “fight.” All couples get annoyed with each other. It’s about how you express the annoyance. There are also times when normal couples feel like they hate each other. Over time, all relationships go through peaks and valleys Remember that keeping positivity in a relationship is a conscious effort but it’s worth it.

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Comedy – The Huffington Post
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13 Awesome Things That Happen When You Get Comfortable In Your Relationship

All too often, saying you're "comfortable” in your relationship comes with a negative connotation, as if you just admitted you're in a sexless, boring, totally-down-to-pee-with-the-door-open partnership. But getting past the butterflies and into the "we"…




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Relationship Advice From Aziz Ansari’s Book ‘Modern Love’

You might not have known you needed relationship advice from Aziz Ansari, but the comedian proves he knows what he’s talking about in his new book,

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Comedy – The Huffington Post
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The Heavy Relationship Is a Password (a Three Minute Refresher on Relationship Normalcy)

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I need to know yours for this to work.

◊◊

Couples share lots of things; bank accounts, sometimes a car. That HBO GO account that you’re actually sharing because it’s your ex’s friend’s account. That extra bedroom that she kind of ending up stealing for yoga. 

And if you fall into the 50% bracket of the population that has an ex-wife or husband (and thus, insignificant), you might even share the responsibility of raising children. Of course if you have an ex, you probably don’t have a lot of trust in this person, which is why you’re an ex. Perhaps you did at one point but it faded somewhere after… oh, I don’t know, day one after you had kids. 

◊◊

Recently, I wrote a blog about what I think is the new modern man; what a modern, 21st and-a-half century man is, something I believe that I am. No doubt, it’s caused an innumerable number of arguments among couples (and for that I’m not sorry). It was kind of my intention. 

But this is all part of the renaissance. The new man. We’re open. We’re transparent. We have few things to hide (if any). 

But any serious relationship, one in which the topics of, “do we want a dog?” or “do we want kids?” is discussed, needs something other than trust and transparency to work. I need your password. Not to your Instagram or ovulation app (Although lots of folks have long-debated whether sharing passwords for things like email or our phone PIN helps or hurts a relationship (I am in the “it helps” camp), I need the password that will make you happy. 

◊◊

Years ago, we would have met our girlfriend or boyfriend through a friend, through work, or God forbid, through grandma whose friend in the nursing home as a granddaughter “who’s just perfect for you.” 

A precipitous courtship would then ensue. Several dates. Actual phone calls. Very little texting or social media interaction. I mean actually talking to the person.

Texting while dating can be hazardous. Nuance is oftentimes missed. Sarcasm taken literally. Had you been conversing like normal people, you’d be learning their cues, even their innocent little peccadillos. What annoys them? When to ask and when not to ask “what’s wrong,” or “do you want to talk about it?” Our social passwords back then were easier to figure out than they are today. 

◊◊

Think of your relationship as a crop, planted in a pretty, quaint greenhouse (built using renewable bamboo). The password is the Sun. And the process of understanding each other is the water. 

Like any crop, we need to nurture and toil over it. A good harvest means the two of you are simpatico. You both understand what the other wants, needs, and desires. Sounds important, right? Sounds like something you should probably know. 

But what is equally important, is understanding what she/he doesn’t want, doesn’t need, or doesn’t desire. 

The big, $ 44 million question: “How do I get the password?!”

Just ask them for it. 

What do they need from you? What does he or she want from you? But don’t neglect the question, “What completely bugs the shit out of you? Because I don’t want to do that.”

It is super-fucking-easy to date somebody. There’s no course to take. No test to ace. Like having children, anyone can do it. Nobody tells you how to do it properly, you just sort of have to learn on your own, by example, or get a little deep with yourself.

What’s difficult is being in a super-fucking-good relationship. One that lasts. One that makes other couples around you hate you for being the “kicking ass and taking names” couple. You’re a team. One that’s completely devoid of resentment, but inundated with adoration for each another. 

This needs time. Patience. And practice. 

Oh… and that password. 

◊◊

Image: Elizabeth Renstrom

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5 Ways Mindfulness Can Put The Spark Back In Your Relationship

Think of your marriage like a bank account: pay into it often with acts of kindness and generosity and it’ll help your relationship no end. High50 wellbeing coach Alex Blossom explains how.

Relationship problems come in all shapes and sizes. Sometimes it might feel as though the spark has gone. It might be that you are going through a stage where you feel irritable and frustrated or you could be feeling neglected or hurt in some way.

Whatever the problem, mindfulness can help you to get through the most tricky of times. These five mindful relationship fixes will help you get back on track.

1. Learn To Listen

Really taking time to listen to your partner can make all the difference. Take time to be genuinely interested in what they have to say. It is so easy to get caught up in our own little world, we can become consumed by our own thoughts and feelings.

When we learn to listen we find out things that we didn’t know, even when we have been together for a long time. By turning our attention outwards, we clear a little bit of head space and make some room for our partner.

2. Just Be

It is so easy to slip into trying to change our partners, wishing that they were different. We can hear ourselves nagging: we don’t want to do it, but sometimes holding our tongue can seem impossible.

Before you jump in and criticize your partner always, take a few deep breaths. Really think about what you will achieve by making a comment. When you next sit down for a meal together try listing five things that you love about each other.

The conversation this creates will get you thinking and feeling more positively.

3. Feel

Touch is a really important sensation, but so often we lose the closeness that we had in the early days of our relationship.

Rather than cuddling up to each other we become protective of our space, bickering over sides of the bed. Rather than taking time to kiss each other when we say goodbye in the morning our minds are perhaps already at work dealing with a situation.

So take the time to really feel next time you and your partner have physical contact. Notice the sensation of warmth and contact and enjoy the closeness, even if only for a moment.

4. Be Compassionate

If your partner is going through a tough time then put yourself in their shoes. Imagine how things are for them. Think about what you would want in their situation: it will make a huge difference.

When you learn to look at things from their perspective you can gain a real understanding of their behavior. When you get to grips with what is going on for your partner everything will seem easier. So many relationship problems stem from a lack of understanding.

5. Invest

Think of your relationship like a bank account. Making withdrawals all the time will leave you in deficit and things can start to look bleak. Paying in more often with acts of kindness and generosity will leave you feeling positive and secure.

Giving to your partner really can make you happy. While your attention is on seeking out an opportunity for kindness it is not consumed by worrying thoughts. You will be free to get on and enjoy life.

Alex Blossom offers mindfulness and wellbeing coaching through private sessions and day retreats. Revitalisedays.co.uk

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Diplo Says Selena Gomez’s Relationship With Zedd Is ‘Fake’

Rumors of a romance between Selena Gomez and Zedd have been swirling since earlier this year, and while neither the singer nor the DJ have confirmed their relationship, producer Diplo thinks it’s all a publicity stunt.

When Radio.com asked Diplo about his harsh Twitter comments on Zedd’s latest album, the American DJ and producer spoke freely about his German colleague, saying that Zedd’s rumored relationship with the 22-year-old is merely a marketing move:

I’m actually not enemies with Zedd by any means. I just think that he came from such a cool place, and now he’s been pegged as a money-maker for a major label to do EDM, which to me isn’t even a genre. But they’ve pegged him for that, they’ve marketed him, even the fake relationship with Selena Gomez, all the things to sell records took away from the music.

Gomez caused a stir in February after sharing an Instagram photo of herself embracing Zedd. She again fueled the fire after gushing about her rumored beau to Radio Disney, calling Zedd “very cute and funny.”

Diplo playfully teased Gomez when he tagged her in a Twitter photo of himself hugging Zedd, to which the “Love You Like A Love Song” singer had an equally playful response:

Around the same time, Gomez and Zedd released a new song together, “I Want You To Know.” Publicity stunt or perfect timing? Hmm.

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Diplo Thinks Zedd Had a “Fake Relationship” With Selena Gomez to Sell Records

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Why Your Relationship May Be In Trouble (And How To Fix It)

The truth is that if your relationship is in trouble, it’s probably because you set it up that way. Read that sentence again: your relationship is in trouble because you set it up that way. And let me be real clear, I’m not saying that you set it up that way because you were in a bad mood once in a while. You didn’t set it up that way because of something really outrageous you did one time five months or five years ago. You set it up that way by actively, consistently, and efficiently designing, programming, and choreographing your entire lifestyle to generate and then support a bad relationship. You have chosen to live in a way in which no other result could occur.

It is not possible for you to have a seriously defective long-term relationship unless you have generated and adopted a lifestyle to sustain it. Every single person in every walk of life has a lifestyle that supports who and what he or she is. If you are a healthy, vibrant, efficient, and productive person who is in touch with your core of consciousness, then I know, without question, that you have a lifestyle that supports that manner of living. If you are emotionally pained and relationally troubled person who has lost touch with your core of consciousness, I know that you have a lifestyle that supports that too. You cannot have a bad relationship unless your lifestyle is characterized by stress, pressure, distraction, and a harried and chaotic existence. Moreover, if you are living in a dysfunctional relationship with another person, it’s because you have a dysfunctional relationship with yourself.

I’m not blaming you; I’m just telling you how it is. A bad relationship cannot exist if it is not fed and nurtured in some way. If you think I am wrong, just look out your window. If you see weeds in your yard or in the field next door, they didn’t just happen. Some way, somehow that weed had to get started. And what’s more, it had to be fed and nurtured in some way. It didn’t grow in concrete; somehow the environment had to support its very existence or it could not be.

I’m not saying you necessarily chose any environment or lifestyle consciously, and I’m not saying that you generated your dysfunctional relationship on purpose. But I’m telling you that the reality of your relationship along with your overall lifestyle and your relationship with yourself are 100 percent inextricably intertwined. If you have not designed and carried out your life to create or allow distance instead of intimacy, combativeness instead of cooperation, blame and rejection instead of accountability and acceptance, you cannot maintain the erosion and pain that you are now experiencing. Problems don’t flourish in isolation; They have to have help and nurturance.

As an example, simply compare the lifestyle of someone who is chronically and morbidly overweight with the lifestyle of someone who is fit, energetic, and of normal weight. I will promise you that both of these people have designed their worlds to sustain what they have become. The overweight person will use food differently. You will find that he or she lives to eat, while a person of normal weight eats to live. This is a painful truth, but it is the truth. When it comes to your relationship, you have chosen to live patterns of thought, feeling and behavior that have generated something that is not giving you what you want. You are living to suffer instead of loving to live. That has to change, and it has to change first before anything else will begin to fall into place.

I have no doubt that many of you at this very moment are saying, “Wait a second, Dr. Phil. All your talk about getting me straight is just great, but you have no idea what a jerk my partner can be. You have no idea what manner of hell my partner brings into my life. I’m fine about making my life better, but what about my partner? Why all this total focus on me? I’m just one-half of this deal!”

Trust me, I do know what you may well be living with, and I promise you, your partner will get his or her turn in the barrel. But in all likelihood, your partner isn’t sitting right beside you reading this. You’re the only one reading it. My only input, my only influence, is with you, so that is who I am focusing on, and if you are smart you will do the same. But I do know it takes two to tango, and if you are able to change yourself, if you are able to create a different lifestyle and environment in which your relationship takes place, if you are able to regain your own power and reclaim your right to dignity and respect, then your partner is going to be seriously affected.

You can’t control your partner. You can’t make changes for your partner. You can’t tell your partner what to do. But you can inspire your partner. You can give your partner a whole new set of behaviors and new set of stimuli to respond to. If you drop out of the destructive mind-set and vicious circle of mutually frustrating interactions that are causing your relationship to implode, if you drop out of the fight and start living a new way, it’s going to be real difficult for your partner to continue spewing and seeking venom. You can stop sabotaging yourself and your relationship, and you can start inspiring the kind of reactions you want from your partner. In the face of such constructive input, he or she can’t fight alone, argue alone, or continue to be offended. Your partner can pout for a while, perhaps withdraw and be suspicious for a while, but eventually, he or she is going to feel pretty stupid sitting over in the corner while you seem to be getting so very much happier and so much more optimistic and at peace with yourself.

Besides, what’s the alternative — to allow your current lifestyle to persist, a lifestyle that with each passing day broadens the gap between you and your hopes and dreams? This isn’t brain-surgery or quantum physics here — what you are doing, how you are living, is not working. Plain and simple, it is not working. If you do not push yourself to find out what it is in your lifestyle that isn’t working, what it is about your lifestyle that has created and supports this negative relationship, you will continue to suffer. You will continue to work on the wrong things that have nothing to do with the status of your relationship at the expense of that which most certainly determines its success or failure. You will try to believe that it’s OK to forget some of your dreams, telling yourself that at least you are “secure” and “comfortable.” You’ll find yourself relying more and more upon the language of losers, telling yourself that you know you “should” do something about your plight and that you’d like to change but that you just aren’t sure where to start. When you choose the behavior, you choose the consequences, so you must start choosing differently right here, right now.

If you are going to rescue your relationship, the first lifeline we have to throw you is to you, so that you can pull yourself out of your emotional swamp. By changing how you treat yourself, you alter the most important element of the entire equation. It means altering the environment in which your relationship exists and changing the priorities that dictate your time and energy. You must re-design the backdrop or context in which your relationship occurs. Until you begin to live with dignity, respect, and emotional integrity, you will not have that quality and level of interaction with anyone else. As I like to say, you cannot give away what you do not have. If you don’t have a pure and healthy love and regard for yourself, how can you possibly give that to anyone else? And if you can’t give it to anyone else, the how can you possibly expect to have it reciprocated?

Modified excerpt from Relationship Rescue: A Seven-Step Strategy for Reconnecting With Your Partner by Phillip C. McGraw, PhD (Hyperion).

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Caitlyn Jenner — Car Crash Victim’s Stepkids … You Can’t Judge Our Relationship

Caitlyn Jenner is out of line when she says the stepchildren of the woman who was killed in that PCH car crash had no right to sue because they were not financially dependent on her … so claim the stepkids. The stepchildren of Kim Howe just filed…

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Nine Years Is the Exact Right Amount of Time to Be In a Bad Relationship: An Essay from Things I’ve Learned from Women Who’ve Dumped Me – Bob Odenkirk

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Nine Years Is the Exact Right Amount of Time to Be In a Bad Relationship: An Essay from Things I’ve Learned from Women Who’ve Dumped Me

Bob Odenkirk

Genre: Comedy

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Publish Date: February 4, 2008

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Exploring the Sexual Time Frame of a Dating Relationship

The ultimate focal point and the coveted goal of a dating relationship is the point where sex can take place without regrets or remorse for the idealistic encounter. Inevitably, when you take part in the dating world, you will come to the question of just how soon you should let things progress to a more intimate level. This is, of course, just a mild and polite way of saying you will need to determine when the time is right to engage in sex.
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5 Things You Should Consider Before Starting An Open Relationship

From swinging to polyamory, many people are now considering non-mongamous relationships.

Recently, the HuffPost Love+Sex Podcast explored ethical non-monogamy, which is consciously, with agreement and consent from all involved, exploring love and sex with multiple people.”

Professor of Human Sexuality Dr. Zhana Vrangalova chatted with HuffPost Love+Sex Podcast hosts Carina Kolodny and Noah Michelson about ethical non-monogamy and what anyone who is considering engaging in these kind of relationships should know. Listen to the podcast and check out some of Dr. Vrangalova’s advice below.

Here are 5 things to think about before entering an open relationship, according to Dr. Vrangalova:

1. Jealousy isn’t necessarily an inherently bad thing.
[Jealousy can be] a healthy emotion to keep track of yourself and your emotional health. There [are] definitely a lot of people who do experience it and it is something seen as constructive, just like any other emotion. Relationships often entail unpleasant or negative emotions — fighting, being sad, being angry, and jealousy is just one of those things.

In monogamous relationships, jealousy is often thought of as something that’s the end of the relationship — it’s seen as catastrophic. Poly people don’t see it as catastrophic — it’s just one other thing to work through because jealousy is a normal reaction to when your sense of self and stability is threatened. Kids feel it all the time. I showed my students this video in class where a baby who sees his mom play with a doll becomes very jealous, and suddenly, he gets very very upset, so it’s when you feel your attachment figure is not there and you need them for some reason and they disappear on you and you wouldn’t like that. It’s a normal reaction.

2. The ethical part of ethical “non-monogamy” is communicating about what you want and about what your limitations are with your partner.
People will feel comfortable with many different things. When you’re starting to open up your relationship you should think about what will make me comfortable and what is too much and threatening. But one thing that pretty much every couple or triad in a relationship has ever experienced is that these rules will change. You start out with a set of rules you think will work for you and some will work and some will not. You might end up thinking this will be easy — no problem — and then you might say, “Oh that hurts! Let’s not do that again.” And sometimes you think something will not feel OK and you try it and you’re like, “Oh that was no big deal! Sure!” So, be open to change and allow for that flexibility.

Also, people start with lots of rules because they need to protect their sense of self and relationship security, and over time they see this is not scary, it won’t end our relationship if I let my partner do these things with other people and they kind of get rid of the rules. All these things are important. Sexual health is another thing you should think about: what’s your level of comfort with sexually transmitted infections (STIs), what protection are you using with others, can your partner ever have unprotected sex and with whom and what needs to have happened before thats OK? You need to talk about all of this. Talk a lot.

3. Non-monogamy can affect your children — but not necessarily negatively
Swinging doesn’t have a lot of impact on children. It becomes more of an issue when we’re talking about poly families, when there are multiple romantic partners who are there, maybe living together and showing affection in the home in front of the children. However, having more people to take care of them, drive them to school or soccer practice or more people who can teach them different things, skills, hobbies, ask about math homework is positive. There’s also more time for the parents. Every now and then you need a break and if there’s someone else to care for kids you get more time for yourself and you can be happier and more satisfied. That’s a big question we still need a lot more research on, but initial research at least suggests things are not necessarily problematic.

4. Ethical non-monogamy doesn’t necessarily mean a greater risk of STIs
When you ask people about the differences and benefits and risks of monogamy versus non-monogamy, the risk of STIs is the single largest difference people think about. They think non-monogamists are extremely risky and monogamists have a very low risk for STIs. In a perfect world where monogamy was done perfectly, that’s probably true — there’s a higher risk with multiple partners. But in real world, the people who claim to be monogamous are often not monogamous, and when you compare rates of STIs among general monogamous relationships, they’re actually similar to non-monogamous people. Research shows that when monogamous people cheat, they’re less likely to use condoms, talk about sexual health history, testing, STIs, and more likely to do it drunk or high. So compared to people in non-monogamous relationships who are doing it openly and honestly — and there’s research to show that when they do use condoms, cheaters are more likely to make condom errors… People in non-monogamous relationships are usually very careful about this, condom carrying, using them, etc.

5. If you’re not ready to invite another person into your relationship, try dabbling in a “grey area.”
[There are many things you can do that are on the non-monogamy spectrum] like watching porn together or talking about meeting up with some other hot people you may have met or flirted with. Acknowledging that there are other people you may be attracted to but you’re not going to do anything with them is another possibility. Or maybe you want to try actually flirting with other people and allowing each other to flirt with other people. Or maybe if you feel comfortable going to a sex party, you can just watch. Or you could go to a sex party and just have sex with your partner without inviting anyone else. So, there are lots of different levels of non-monogamy, and things you could do and keep it mostly monogamous with no physical contact with anyone else, but still experiment.

If you want to download and/or listen to the podcast offline, head to iTunes or Stitcher.

And if you have ever been in an open relationship, head here to give your feedback on your experiences.

This podcast was produced and edited by Katelyn Bogucki with additional production by Jorge Corona. Like Love + Sex? Subscribe, rate and review our podcast on iTunes. Have an idea for an episode? Find us on Twitter @HuffPostPodcast.

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9 Signs You’re Finally in a Mature, Adult Relationship

This was originally published at www.elitedaily.com

Media dictates so much in today’s world — including relationships.

Whether portraying unrequited love, forbidden love or passionate love, the media’s ideas of love all have something in common: drama.

After all, drama drives the media.

But, guess what? When you’re in a dramatic relationship, this reality isn’t so appealing. Dramatic relationships are just plain sh*tty, and there’s nothing romantic or alluring about that.

Real relationships, to be quite honest, could almost be considered boring, and the media doesn’t value “boring.”

For years, I bought into the idea that a relationship needed some type of drama to be legitimized. As I’m settling down, I’m realizing how truly wrong and exhausting that mentality was.

For the first time in… well, ever, I’m in a healthy, mature relationship. It’s different than previous relationships I’ve had because this one is real. It is solid. It is stable. It is everything I’ve ever wanted, and everything I didn’t know I needed.

It’s also everything I ran away from in the past because it just seemed too “boring.” Only now am I realizing that there is a difference between a boring relationship and a stable, mature one.

1. Being your significant other’s partner isn’t hard.

Until recently, I always struggled when I was in a relationship. Feelings of uncertainty and anxiety were overwhelmingly normal, while feeling secure in the relationship was not.

Maybe this is obvious, but it shouldn’t be the case. Being someone’s partner should come easily rather than feel like a chore or a responsibility.

2. You don’t have to be in contact 24/7.

Part of an adult relationship is realizing that each person has his or her own world, separate of one another. This means that being together all the time or constantly texting just isn’t feasible, and that is OK.

Actually, it’s even nice. I love my boyfriend, but if I talked to him constantly, I’d go crazy.

3. You don’t want to change your significant other.

I’ll admit that I have a history of seeking out broken people and trying to fix them, which never ends well. This isn’t the case in a healthy relationship.

In a healthy relationship, changing your partner shouldn’t even be a desire on your radar. Changing annoying little habits is one thing, but changing or fixing who someone is as a person should not be your goal. Maybe he or she isn’t perfect, but he or she shouldn’t have to be.

4. Your significant other balances you out — and even calls you out.

Rather than always agreeing on every aspect of life, your relationship tests and challenges your views. Your partner brings new views to light — possibly ideas that oppose your own.

When you don’t agree on a topic, it isn’t the end of the world. You acknowledge each other’s positions and move on.

5. Discussing the future isn’t scary.

In immature relationships, there is less certainty and less communication about the status of the relationship, therefore less willingness to discuss the future.

In an adult relationship, plans can be made months in advance without stopping to wonder where the relationship will or won’t be.

6. You may disagree, but you don’t all-out fight.

Observing how the other person argues and adjusting your own style is a learning process, but part of a mature relationship. For example, I tend to shut down when I am angry, whereas my boyfriend is more direct.

Adjusting to this was difficult at first, but now that we know each other’s style of disagreement, we are able to communicate in a more mature manner.

7. Showing your love becomes more important than verbally expressing it.

It used to irritate me that I am more vocal about telling my boyfriend I love him. He, on the other hand, doesn’t say it as often, but shows it in his actions.

Over time, I’ve realized that this is preferable to hearing it all the time. Sometimes love is in the day-to-day actions rather than the literal words, and this is definitely a more mature viewpoint.

8. Jealousy is a non-issue because the relationship is founded on trust.

In an adult relationship, the male can have female friends and vice-versa without the world coming to a screeching halt. Each partner is secure in the other’s commitment and does not possess an unfounded worry about cheating or dishonesty.

9. You’re in sync with one another — mentally and physically.

This may sound like it’s about sex, but it is not the case. It’s more about knowing a person so well and having developed such a connection that his or her smallest movement can be predicted — or sentences finished. It’s about him or her becoming an extension of you in a healthy way.

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Reader Question: I’m in a Great Relationship, But How Do I Not Lose Myself in It?

Since I’ve been writing this column for Glamour, I’ve been getting so many lovely messages from readers. I love hearing from you all—the stories of love lost and found, of heartbreak and healing—all of it….




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Teacher Describes How Sexual Relationship With 15-Year-Old Student Began — And Then Continued After She Resigned

Jennifer Caswell, a former middle school teacher in Hollis, Oklahoma, was arrested last year in Mississippi on suspicion of statutory rape and contributing to the delinquency of a minor after police found her in a hotel room with a 15-year-old former student.

In an exclusive interview with Dr. Phil, Caswell opens up about what she claims led her to be vulnerable to his advances, and what happened when she, a 27-year-old married mother, and the student had sex in her classroom.

In the video above, Caswell — known by her married name, Jennifer Sexton, at the time — claims, “He came in. I was working on things. He kept coming closer to me, and I would kind of walk away to another area of the classroom. And he just walked up to me and then he kissed me. And then, it just kind of went from there.”

“How long did this encounter last?” Dr. Phil asks.

“He was probably in my room for maybe two hours, I guess,” says Caswell.

“How long was the inappropriate part?”

“Maybe 10 or 15 minutes.”

“Did both of you get completely disrobed?”

“No,” says Caswell. “I was walking around the classroom straightening up the desks, and I guess it was standing up.”

She adds, “I could have easily walked out of my classroom. But I didn’t … I knew it was wrong, but I didn’t.”

Dr. Phil’s exclusive interview airs Tuesday — watch more here as Caswell explains why she travelled 650 miles to see the boy, and what happened when police knocked on her hotel room door. Plus, does she say she would rekindle the relationship with the boy if given the chance?

Need Dr. Phil’s help in your life? Share your story here.

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How To Date Beautiful Ladies And Make Them Beg You For A Relationship

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Facebook Could Spell Big Trouble For Your Relationship. Here’s Why

Take it from a divorce attorney: Facebook may be doing irreparable harm to your relationship.

In a recent HuffPost Live interview, San Diego-based divorce attorney Zephyr Hill discussed the role Facebook and other social media platforms have played in many of his clients’ relationships.

“I can confirm it’s involved in a lot of cases,” Hill told host Nancy Redd. “People are talking about just being disconnected — instead of cuddling in bed and watching ‘Game of Thrones,’ someone is staring at their Facebook feed all night long and not talking to their spouse. It’s definitely a factor on that level.”

Hill added that once couples move forward with divorce, Facebook often proves to be a “hotbed of evidence,”

Watch the clip above for more from Hill or head here to watch the full segment on how social media is affecting relationships.

Keep in touch! Check out HuffPost Divorce on Facebook and Twitter. Sign up for our newsletter here.

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The 10 Most Dangerous Phrases In A Relationship

dangerous

You’re on your best behavior when you first start dating someone: polite to a fault, quick to suggest sharing dessert (later, you enter “order your own!” territory), and really, truly careful about what you say.

Then, somewhere down the line, you get comfortable. A little more loose-lipped. You say things you don’t mean.

An apology generally goes a long way, but some things said in the heat of the moment may be irreversibly damaging to your relationship. Below, 10 phrases you should banish from your argument arsenal.

1. Anything that begins with “you always” or “you never.”
There’s no hope of having a productive conversation once you or your S.O. makes sweeping accusations against each other, said Virginia Gilbert, licensed marriage and family therapist.

“Uttering these words will immediately put the other person on the defensive. Instead of getting what you want, the two of you will spend the rest of the evening — or the rest of your relationship — debating who’s right. Instead, use ‘I’ statements. For instance, ‘I feel that I’m usually the one to say ‘I love you’ and it would make me feel good if you could say it first sometimes.’ Keeping the focus on your needs instead of pointing out your partner’s shortcomings — as glaring as they may be — invites an opportunity for positive change.”

2. “Why do you want to do that? You never used to like to [fill in the blank].”
Healthy, long-lasting relationships involve two people who are able to grow together. You’re different people than the ones you were when you first met, so don’t freak out or assume there’s some ulterior motive if your partner changes his or her habits.

“You each need room to grow,” said relationship author and divorce attorney Christina Pesoli. “Just as you wouldn’t be threatened by him updating his wardrobe or growing a beard, you shouldn’t be threatened when he updates his hobbies, either. Developing a new interest isn’t a threat to your relationship, but your refusal to allow him or her to do so is. If you’re with someone who never tries anything new, your relationship will eventually grow stale. So as long as he’s not talking about learning to cook meth or joining ISIS, try embracing his new hobbies.”

3. “You’re overreacting!”
Related, equally annoying-as-hell phrases include: “You’re being too sensitive.” “Don’t get so defensive!” “Calm down.” Let one of these sentences slip and you’ll more than likely find yourself in the proverbial dog house, said William J. Doherty, Ph.D., professor of family social science at the University of Minnesota.

“Saying this is a favorite of men trying to get women to stop being upset,” he said. “It’s never worked in human history, but why not keep trying? The problem is that when in the midst of being upset, no one thinks their feelings are unjustified, and thus they feel unheard and put down. It would make anyone madder.”

4. “Mmmhmm. Mmmhmm. Wait — what did you say?”
Think you’ve mastered the art of scrolling through Instagram while pretending to listen to your S.O. talk? Think again.

“Eventually, your partner will conclude that you’re not all that interested in what he has to say — and it’s hard to argue with that,” Pesoli said. “Talking to someone who doesn’t really care about what you’re saying can be hard on the ol’ self esteem — especially when that someone is your significant other. Being too busy to listen every once in a while is understandable. Being too busy to listen all the time is a relationship killer.”

5. “I told you so.”
What, you thought we’d get through this list without including this classic example?

“Say ‘I told you so’ one too many times and pretty soon, resentment sets in,” dating expert Marina Sbrochi said. “No one likes to be thought of as dumb. Try empathy instead and see how your relationship grows.”

6. “Not tonight (or tomorrow night, or any night), honey.”
You and your partner aren’t always going to be on the same page when it comes to sex. You each should absolutely feel free to say, “Not really in the mood after that brick-sized carnitas burrito.” But you don’t want “not tonight, not ever” to become the norm.

“Defaulting to ‘not tonight’ is a bad habit to form,” said Pesoli. “Physical intimacy is what makes your relationship with your significant other different than any of your other relationships; otherwise, the two of you are just roommates who may or may not have kids together. If the fire goes out in the bedroom, there’s no question that your relationship will be in peril. Making a little effort to have sex with your S.O. is almost always a good idea.”

7. “What’s wrong with you?”
Below-the-belt personal attacks have no place in a healthy, loving relationship. Your goal should be to prop your partner up and be his or her cheerleader in hard times, not to bring them down.

“If you find yourself saying something like ‘Are you that stupid?’ ‘What kind of a parent does that?’ or ‘You’re just like your mother,’ you need to cease and desist,” said marriage therapist Becky Whetstone.

8. “I don’t believe you.”
There are bound to be times when you suspect your partner is bending the truth a bit — or a lot. It’s how you relay your skepticism that will move you closer to discovering the whole story.

“Maybe you really do suspect he or she has feelings for someone else, for instance, but there’s a better way to go about it than accusing your partner of lying,” said Doherty. “Saying ‘I don’t believe you’ is inflammatory and almost always backfires. A better version is this: ‘I’m having trouble believing you are telling me the whole story.'”

9. “I want a divorce.”
When you threaten to breakup or divorce, you’re pulling out the big guns . You may have deep regrets about saying it later, but the damage is done. As idle as the threat may be, the message to your partner is loud and clear: you already have one foot out the door. And who wants to be in a relationship like that?

“Simply put, it’s emotional blackmail,” said Whetstone. “If what you say has a tone of ‘if you don’t do this, you’ll pay or I’ll leave,’ it’s eventually going to take a toll on your partner.”

10. “If you really loved me, you’d…”
Nope. Stop right there. Your partner shouldn’t ever feel pressured to do something he or she doesn’t want to do to prove his or her love for you.

“There’s nothing like guilt combined with a stealthy ultimatum to drain the love right out of a relationship,” said Gilbert. “Instead of trying to manipulate your partner, be transparent about what you want: ‘I miss spending time with you and I’d like to have a regular date night’ is a direct, non-confrontational approach that’s far more likely to get you the love you want than holding your partner hostage emotionally.”

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Amanda Seyfried and Justin Long’s Relationship Began on Instagram


The post that sparked the romance? A snail photo.

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Bruce Jenner Admits His ”Big Secret” Prevented Him From Forming a ”Close” Relationship With Scott Disick

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Teacher Who Had Sexual Relationship With 15-Year-Old Claims Marriage Left Her Craving Attention

What could lead a 27-year-old married teacher with a young son to have a sexual relationship with a 15-year-old student? Jennifer Caswell, known as Jennifer Sexton before her recent divorce, speaks out for the first time since the former middle school teacher from Hollis, Oklahoma, was charged with three counts of second-degree rape.

Caswell, who taught sixth, seventh and eighth grade, recalls when the student/teacher relationship became inappropriate. “He was flirty. I should have put a stop to it then, and I didn’t,” she says. “I wasn’t used to getting attention. It felt nice to have someone to compliment me and things like that, because I felt very unwanted.”

She tells Dr. Phil that she felt vulnerable during her seven-year marriage. “I never got complimented. Never even got a birthday present, Christmas present, for Valentine’s Day, nothing. I felt really bad about myself,” she says, fighting tears. “I never thought I’d be in this situation. I’m not a monster and I’m not a predator. I made a stupid decision.”

Dr. Phil asks, “Would you say the marriage was not a good marriage?”

Caswell explains, “We didn’t fight, but that’s only because we didn’t talk. It was like living with a roommate … He would come home. He would talk on the phone to his friends for an hour or two, and then he would go to the playroom and play his Xbox until 1 or 2 in the morning.”

Dr. Phil probes, “Was he affectionate with you physically?”

“No, we never held hands or cuddled on the couch or anything like that,” Caswell says. “I wanted that. I mean, I need that and I wasn’t getting it there.”

She claims her former student reacted to her quite differently. “He would always tell me how beautiful I was and how I was a good person on the inside,” says Caswell about the teen, whom she describes as “funny” and “mature.”

Watch as Caswell describes how they became intimate in her classroom, and see more from Dr. Phil’s exclusive interview on Tuesday’s episode — check local listings here.

Need Dr. Phil’s help in your life? Share your story here.

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Young Woman With Baby On The Way Struggles To Leave Her Troubled Relationship

Crystal, 25, and James, 26, have one child together and another on the way, but their on-again/off-again relationship is in turmoil.

“The first time James got violent with me, I was almost 15 weeks pregnant,” alleges Crystal in the video above. “When he hit my head against the wall, I was in shock, but my first instinct was to cover my stomach, because I didn’t know if he was going to stop.”

She claims James has been violent with her on two other occasions since, including when she was three months pregnant with their second child.

“James freaked out and pushed me against the wall. Next thing you know, he’s on top of me, and his hand was right here,” claims Crystal, pointing to her neck. “My child was on the same bed as us, and he’s on top of me. I remember telling him, ‘I can’t believe you did this again — I’m pregnant!’”

But James says he has never laid a hand on Crystal. “She lied, and called the police and tried to ruin me. I didn’t touch her,” he says, explaining that Crystal was actually aggressive with him, and that she is out for revenge. “I’m a great man. I have a good heart,” maintains James, pointing out that he has broken up with Crystal numerous times, but she still pursues him and calls him incessantly. He tells Dr. Phil, “I’m here to help Crystal so she can move on and stop all these lying, dramatic situations so we can just co-parent in a sophisticated matter.”

How can Crystal stop herself from being drawn back to James every time they split? On today’s episode, Dr. Phil tells the couple: “Both of you are very young, and both of you can start making some right decisions. I’m one of those people who believes that not everybody you lose is a loss … You do not belong together.”

He encourages Crystal to work on healing herself, so when the time is right, she can co-parent with James in healthy manner.

“It’s important for you to understand that you don’t need to always be in a relationship … You don’t need to be in a relationship to be OK,” Dr. Phil tells Crystal.

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Fantasizing Is Great – But Facing Reality Brings You Closer to a True Intimate Relationship

If you fail time and again developing a successful intimate relationship, it might be that you approach dating and partners in an unrealistic, fantasy-based manner. In order to succeed, you need to wake-up to reality, facing dating and relationship in a more down-to-earth manner.
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7 Questions To Ask Yourself If Your Relationship Feels Stuck

If your relationship is in trouble, then you have to be willing to admit that whatever you are thinking and feeling and doing is not working. You have to be willing to move your position on some very deep beliefs and long-held emotions and behavioral patterns. When I say “move your position,” I mean that you must be willing to utterly change the way you think, feel, and act in relationship to yourself and your partner. This can be harder than you could ever imagine. I am asking you to give up your security blankets and free-fall. I am asking you to hit the erase button on ideas that you may have been holding for 10, 20, 30 or 40 years. I am asking you to wipe the slate clean and start over in your thinking. Bottom line, I am asking you to believe, once again, that you are a qualified person who deserves a quality relationship. Getting back in touch with your core of consciousness will remind and convince you that there is nothing wrong with you that justifies your having less than a rewarding relationship in which you can live, love, and laugh every day of your life.

Are you ready to embrace a new kind of thinking, a new belief system, a new way of looking at yourself and your partner? To see if you’re ready to move forward, answer the following questions:

1. Can you forget what you think you know about managing relationships?
2. Can you decide to measure the quality of your relationship based on results instead of intentions or promises?
3. Can you decide that you would rather be happy than right?
4. Can you stop playing the blame game and recognize that it is a new day?
5. Can you be willing to move your position on how you approach and engage your partner?
6. Can you be willing to get real and be honest with yourself, about yourself, no matter how painful it is?
7. Can you stop the denial and be completely, totally honest about the state of your current relationship?

I know that right now it may be difficult for you to honestly answer yes to all of those questions. Either way, don’t give up, at least not until I tell you two very important things.

First: It is not too late. If you do not allow yourself to believe and accept that, you will think your way out of this relationship before we have the chance to save it. You may think your relationship has failed, you may feel like you have tried everything, you may feel tired, deflated and defeated, but I’m telling you, you have to get that thought out of your head or you are dead in the water with an anvil tied around your ankle. No matter how many times you’ve been hurt — no matter how many times you’ve been disappointed, no matter how many times you’ve believed it could be different only to be blindsided again — you have to be willing to give yourself one more chance. Even if you have hurt so long and so badly that you aren’t at all sure if you care whether your relationship survives; even if you’re not sure you can ever subject yourself to any more pain from a relationship; even if you do not feel motivated or very hopeful, you can start getting out of your ditch if you will just say to yourself, “I wish I felt good about my relationship again.” That’s all we need. If all you can muster in your mind and heart is to say, “I wish I felt good about this relationship again, and I wish I felt lovingly toward this person again, because I know that at least at one time in my life those emotions felt good,” then that is enough of an ember for us to fan into a flame.

Second: You are not alone. You might feel bewildered and demoralized right now, engulfed by the loneliness that comes with a deteriorating relationship. You may feel intimidated and overwhelmed by what may seem like insurmountable problems or hurts that tend to run so very, very deep. But I want you to know that from now on, you have a partner. You have a partner who is willing to walk with you through this intimidating maze of emotion and who is willing to interact without judgment or criticism, but with the willingness and courage to tell you the truth. I am going to be that partner for you. I have now counseled thousands of people and taught tens of thousands in seminars, helping them create and maintain the key relationships in their lives. I have learned what you know and, more important, what you don’t know about sharing your life with another person. I have designed this approach to meet you at whatever point you find yourself in your relationship and give you the power to make changes — power that can come only from learning the absolute naked, unvarnished truth. Indeed, once you learn the real truth about how you got into this mess, and then once you learn what you can do to get rid of the mess, you will shudder to think you almost walked away. You are closer to success than you could ever imagine, if you just have the courage to get real with yourself.

You must take a stand that you are not going to defy the odds, defy your own insecurities, and defy the conventional wisdom that has failed you so miserably. Set this personal standard for yourself from the very beginning. Adopt a philosophy of passion that says, “I will not quit. I will not allow my hopes and dreams to be pushed aside.” Never forget, this life is your only shot. This is no dress rehearsal. You must be willing to reach for what you want and reach right now. And if you are willing to settle for less, then that is exactly what you will get.

You must not forget about the importance of your relationship with yourself. You must demand nothing less than the best of yourself and for yourself. You must tell yourself that it is not wrong to want it all. It is not wrong to demand dignity, love, honor and romance in your life. You must decide that you are worthy of everything that you want. You must decide that peace, joy, and abundance in a relationship is not just for other people. It is for you. It is not selfish to want it, it is not naive to want it, and it is not immature to expect it. What is immature is to sell out and settle for less than what you really want.

It is not wrong to want, expect, demand, and aspire to a relationship in which you are treated with honor, dignity, and respect. It is not unrealistic to believe that your mate can and should be your soft place to fall. It is not a pipe dream to believe that God has provided for you another person in this world whom you can trust with your most intimate and vulnerable secrets and needs.

I am not suggesting that blind optimism or denial about the risks is the right approach. I am not telling you to pretend that there are not problems, or that they will go away. I am asking you to exercise the belief within yourself that you can do this, and that your relationship can be much better. I have often said, “Sometimes we make the right decision, and sometimes we have to make the decision right.”

You might not like having to blow up a bunch of deceptive but highly destructive myths about what makes a relationship work, and you might not like having to confront the truth about yourself — but I predict that you will love the outcome. You will love that you will be able to reprogram yourself for success rather than failure, that you will be able to go from an individual hoping for a future to an individual making your future happen. And then both you and your partner can begin working to get what you want, to stop the pain that both of you are feeling, and to create more peace, love, and the deepest of joy in your relationship.

Modified excerpt from Relationship Rescue: A Seven-Step Strategy For Reconnecting With Your Partner by Phillip C. McGraw, PhD (Hyperion).

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10 Signs Your Relationship Is Over

Sometimes it can be difficult to spot the signs that your relationship is over. Maybe things aren’t as good as they used to be. Perhaps one of you has been unhappy recently and you can’t figure out why. Here are 10 signs that your relationship is over.

1. Who Are You?
When you first started dating, there was no subject that was off-limits. You and your man could talk all day and all night long. He was your best friend and the person you called multiple times a day. Now, trying to have a conversation with him is worse than having your teeth pulled.

2. Bye Bye Sex
Has your man lost interest in sex… with you? You put on your sexiest lingerie, but just he isn’t interested. Does he tell you that he’s not in the mood or that he’s tired or had a long day? If you can’t remember the last time you got busy between the sheets, you’re about to embark on a really long dry spell, which is one of the main signs that your relationship is over.

3. Orgasm Who?
When the relationship was just beginning, you were having orgasms around the clock. They were so frequent that you thought life couldn’t get any better. You were literally in sex heaven. Now, you don’t remember the last time you had one. An orgasm is a woman’s way of connecting with her man. If there’s no orgasm, there’s no connection. Realize it might be time to say goodbye to your relationship.

4. Call Me!
The roles have reversed. In the beginning he used to call you, text you and send you cute love notes all the time. Now, you’re the one constantly calling him. What happened? His heart just isn’t in the relationship anymore.

5. Shower Time
Has your man been taking really long showers? He’s in there for a while and you wonder what he could possibly be doing? If his long shower time has become a routine, he’s probably not just rinsing off…

6. Where’d The Fun Go?
When you first met, your boyfriend was Mr. Romantic. He loved surprising you with home-cooked dinner nights and incredible vacations. Now, trying to get him to take you on a date is practically impossible.

7. Hey, Friends
Have you been spending a lot of extra time with your friends? Is your man busy that you haven’t seen him in weeks? Red flag.

8. Work, Work, Work
Is your boyfriend turning into a workaholic? He always spent a lot of time at the office, but now he seems to have work events every other night. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but it sounds like he’s avoiding you.

9. Forget Me Not

Does he seem really absent-minded these days? Does he forget all special occasions like holidays and anniversaries? Perhaps he’s trying to send you little subconscious hints that he doesn’t want to be in the relationship anymore.

10. World War III
Does it feel like you’re fighting a war in your personal life? If you and your partner are always at each other’s throats, something is clearly wrong. It’s common for couples to fight. If they didn’t, make-up sex wouldn’t be as much fun as it is. But there’s a fine line between healthy fighting and fighting incessantly with no resolution.

If your life sounds anything like this article, it’s time to make a change. You’re too good to settle for anything but the best.

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Which ’80s Actress Had a Secret Relationship with JFK Jr. | Where Are They Now? | OWN

‘Purple Rain’ star Apollonia opens up about the secret relationship she says she had with John F. Kennedy Jr. in the ’80s.

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5 Things Everyone Worries About When a Long-Distance Relationship Goes Same-City

Here's the thing about long-distance relationships: If all goes well, you'll likely end up living in the same city sooner or later. As this "long-distance end date" inches ever closer, it's easy to start overanalyzing…




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11 Images Capture The Emotional Stages Of The Mother-Daughter Relationship

The bond between a mother and daughter changes over time, facing new challenges at every life stage. Whether your mother-daughter relationship is loving, fractured, fraught or all of the above, it’s always going to be complex.

Photographer and artist Julia Fullerton-Batten tackles these relationship complexities in her 2012 photo series “Mothers And Daughters.” Although Fullerton-Batten debuted the images a few years ago, the emotions they capture still resonate with any woman who has a strong relationship with her mother and/or daughter.

The series features 20 real mother and daughter pairs at multiple stages of life, with varying degrees of closeness and distance. Each photo shows a pair of women in their own environments in order to capture the true emotional bond between the two. “I realized how much the fragility and vulnerability of females is exposed fully in the mother-daughter relationship,” Fullerton-Batten told The Huffington Post.

Fullerton-Batten said she gave some direction to the two women in each image, but also let the relationships of each mother and daughter inform the poses they ended up in. The final photographs expose a beautiful synthesis of Fullerton-Batten’s perspective as a daughter and granddaughter, and the relationship of each pair of women.

third time around
“Third Time Around”

“Over passage of time the [mother-daughter] relationship changes significantly. The babe-in-arms is fully dependent on the mother, but at the other end of the age scale, the mother often becomes dependent on her daughter to satisfy her emotional needs,” Fullerton-Batten wrote in her artist statement. “In the adult relationship the intimacy of the bond is established on the love, struggle and rivalry of a shared life-time, leading to a mature understanding and acceptance of each other. Between childhood and adulthood, the full spectrum of emotions is played out. My images try to capture all of these very different stages in this extremely special relationship.”

Fullerton-Batten said the project is “both documentary and biographical,” as the series also illustrates her memories of her and her two sisters’ relationships with their mother, and the relationship between her mother and grandmother.

Check out 11 images from Fullerton-Batten’s series below.

the party is over
“The Party Is Over”

the divorce
“The Divorce”

alabaster doll
“Alabaster Doll”

pretty new things
“Pretty New Things”

intimate moments
“Intimate Moments”

teenage reflection
“Teenage Reflection”

inner tensions
“Inner Tensions”

memories
“Memories”

burning the past
“Burning The Past”

alone again
“Alone Again”

Head over to Fullerton-Batten’s website to see the rest of the series.

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Need to File for a Divorce!

My Call to Dr. Amy, Relationship Therapist

Hi, this is a message for Dr. Amy. I’m calling to possibly set up a session. Basically, I’m hoping to find myself happy and stable in a relationship, and your website says you’ve taken thousands of people from no relationship to relationship, so I thought maybe we should meet, as long as I’m in L.A for a bit. Also, I totally agree where you say we never see real change if we’re staying in our comfort zone. I’m always a little uncomfortable, so real change may be just a few minor discomforts away! Ha ha. Ok. My number is 917-444-4444. My name is Nora. Thanks.

***

Hi, Dr. Amy? You’re there! Did you get my message? Great! I called again to add just one more thing. but since I have you, can we talk for like 2 minutes? I have a question about one of the affirmations on your website.

The one where “I accept myself unconditionally, right now.” I tried it last night and it felt weird. Can I do it with you on the phone now, to make sure I’m doing it right?

Ok, good, I’m just going to do it now, ok? I’m going to accept myself unconditionally, right now.

Ok, right now. Ready?

Ok. Ready?

I accept myself unconditionally, right now.

How was that, was that right?

Ok, no, I’m just kidding, Dr. Amy. I know what unconditional means. I know there’s no right or wrong with that one. I’m just having a little fun. Do you think we could work together on the relationship thing?

Homework! Let me write this down.

What was my longest relationship?

What do I believe I’ll receive from my ideal relationship?

Can I clarify the question about my longest relationship? Because I know that a lot of couples stay together for years and don’t have sex, so I’ve definitely been in those kinds. We’d start off sort of dating, with some physical intimacy, and then we’d start hanging out every month or so on someone’s sofa watching TV. Sometimes with a sleepover, and maybe a little fooling around. And we text to say hi when someone’s on vacation or something.

That doesn’t count? What about when a guy comes over every few weeks, or months, and the sexual charge stays pretty strong for a few years?

No? What about guys I’ve hung out with regularly for months and slept with maybe once a week, ish, and we were nice to each other.

Ok, then what exactly do you mean by relationship?

Ok, what do you mean by boundaries?

Then it’s just one, 14 years ago.

Wait, two, if you count Carlton, in high school.

Oh: Scott. Percussionist. College.

Wait, four, Andy, at the bagel store I worked in.

Sure, I’d say they lasted about one year.

No, that’s the total time for all of those together if you add them up. But the longest contiguous one was the one from 14 years ago. We definitely had boundaries. Like, if one of us had to use the bathroom in the morning, the other would go out to get coffee or groceries. Even though the apartment had 2 full baths. But we had sex, it was stable, and went for like 4 months until the first breakup.

Absolutely, you can call me back. Ten minutes? Ok.

***

Hi, Dr. Amy? It’s Nora. It’s been about 15, so I thought I’d call. I’m thinking I won’t really need therapy. I just haven’t found the right guy yet.

Fine. Then it’s all emanating from me, I’m a slave to my subconscious fears, and there’s no point in working with you then, right? Just kidding. We should set up a session.

Biggest fear?

I have two, off the top of my head. The first is that the minute I say I want something, it’ll be taken from me. The second is that I’ll be bound to a man who doesn’t love me enough and who makes me feel lonely and empty every time we have sex.

You’re writing that down? Is that a diagnosis? No, don’t tell me.

Interesting. Maybe you’re right, maybe I’d do well with a long distance relationship. Or with, how’d you just put it, someone who doesn’t require a lot of my energy or attention?

But I want to live with someone, Dr. Amy. I bond quickly. I can’t even say goodbye to a girlfriend after dinner without feeling sad. And it always seems like just when I’m starting to relax, we have to say goodbye. But then sometimes it’s such a relief to be alone, so I can hear my own thoughts and not get all rattled with other peoples’ needs and quirks. But then, I really wanna be married, because I’ve always dreamed of having one of those passionate affairs with someone who’s also in a stable, comfortable marriage. Kidding again! Can I call you right back? I wanna check this text for a second, if it’s from Tony.

Ok, really quickly: I met him my first week in L.A. at a happy hour at the Parq Bar at the Montage Hotel.

Fair enough. A hotel bar in a city I don’t plan to live in for a long time is not the best bet for finding a long-term relationship. In my defense, I went for the free jazz, and Tony showed up for the happy hour fish tacos.

Yes, I had a therapist, about 15 years ago for a few years. It helped.

Yes, I agree. I’m making choices that are leaving me bereft and preventing me from achieving a gratifying, trusting, loving relationship.

Yes, I do want a real relationship before the end of my life.

Yes, I’m free tomorrow at 12 or 1, whichever is better for you.

Ok, let’s do 12. Thank you for your time. See you tomorrow.

***

Hi Dr. Amy, this is Nora again. Please call me when you get the chance. I just realized I’m not free tomorrow at 12 or 1. I’m getting a bikini wax. I’m overdue. We can reschedule for any other time this week. Thanks. It’s Nora.

***

Hello? Yes, this is Nora. Hi Greg, yes, I left Dr. Amy a message about rescheduling.

Friday at 2 is perfect. Can I just leave a message with you to give to her? It’s about Tony. Some background, so we don’t waste time in the session on Friday?

Sure, just the basics. Tony is 6’3.” He’s a strapping, Latino radiologist, in his early thirties.

Yes, well, he sounds yummy, Greg, because he’s yummy. That’s why I waited through 5 weeks of scattered text messages to make a date for dinner last Thursday.

Sushi.

On Beverly Drive, maybe? I can’t remember the name. But can you tell Dr. Amy that Tony paid for the sushi and the valet parking, and he also took me on the Julia Roberts walk on Rodeo Drive, and that it doesn’t matter to me that he doesn’t distinguish in text messages between y-o-u-r and y-o-u-apostrophe-r-e. And I’m not ashamed of the blowjob in my car in the garage below my apartment building. I haven’t given one in ages, it seemed good to break the spell.

Thank you for understanding.

Yes, he texted the next day, we made a plan for Sunday, yesterday, and then I woke up yesterday with a pot brownie hangover, and also I could suddenly see clearly all the things I want in life, because I don’t have any of them –

You think it’s the brownie? I got it at a dispensary on Melrose that gets good Yelp reviews. They also had peach pound cake.

Oh! Rice Krispee treats sound great. Maybe that would make a difference. So I texted Tony yesterday morning to see what time he’d be over, and then I called a few hours later, and when he didn’t return my text or voice mail, that led to some crying and feeling like I was falling into a bottomless upside down sky with no one around to hear me cry out, and that’s when I found Dr. Amy’s stuff online.

Thank you, Greg. You got all of that? Ok, thanks.

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Comedy – The Huffington Post
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Woman Gives Boyfriend Beyoncé Exam to Test Relationship

Relationships are always full of little tests, whether you know you're taking them or not, but they're hardly ever actual written tests. However this woman wanted to make sure she was investing her time and energy on the right guy—so she gave him a Beyoncé exam to make sure. Fair. Allie Davis, known on Twitter as @Fergyonce, is a 21-year-old Bey superfan, and on Monday morning she shared a tweet that quickly became viral (and sparked some ideas for others in a relationship). Posting two photos of the 10-question "Official Allie Davis Relationship Test," she wrote, "I gave my boyfriend a Beyoncé exam to make sure we can stay together. He passed." Whew! The corrected exam asked questions like naming three of Queen B's hits (so easy) and "Circle the correct version of Beyoncé's full name," along with asking a few questions about One Direction and Allie's favorite rappers (FYI, they're Kanye West, Jay Z and Nicki Minaj). As stated at the top of the test, her boyfriend needed a 60 percent or higher to pass (and therefore, remain her significant other). Luckily, he got an impressive 80 percent! Davis told BuzzFeed she and her boyfriend have been dating for two and a half years and that he was "relieved" to have passed.
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The Single Greatest Threat to a Healthy Relationship

An introduction into the strange world of dating. The single greatest threat to a healthy relationship will be familiar to some, surmounted even less. Perhaps you can find something you want.
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

How Relationship Experts Knew They Found ‘The One’

“When you know, you know.” That’s the conventional wisdom when it comes to figuring out if the person you’re dating is the person you’ll be with in the long, long term.

But when and how does that seemingly elusive feeling of assurance strike? We recently asked a group of married relationship experts to tell us about the moment they knew they had found The One. Below, authors, professors, therapists and other relationship professionals share their stories.

1. They never ran out of things to say.
“On our third date, we met in the late afternoon for drinks, then we saw a movie, followed by a long, leisurely dinner. Then we decided to walk. All night. First to a cafe in North Beach, then to a jazz bar, and then just up and down the San Francisco hills, until around 6 a.m. when we said goodnight at my front door. Not once did we get bored or run out of things to say. I knew then that 10, 20, 30 years out, we’d still be talking, laughing, keeping life fresh and interesting. And we are.” – Winifred Reilly, licensed marriage and family therapist and relationship blogger

2. What she lacked, he had in spades.
“I knew my husband was The One during our first real date, which was a trip to Miami since we lived in different cities at the time. He navigated us around in a rental car, which was impressive since I have no directional capacity at all. He also was very gentle when rubbing sunscreen on me, which I liked because I thought it meant he was kind and a caretaker. I was right!” – Dr. Samantha Rodman, psychologist and dating coach

3. The relationship felt totally, completely right.
“My wife and I met in high school, we broke up on graduation, but rekindled the relationship in our senior year of college. She had the opportunity to study in Europe, and I spontaneously decided to join her for a year in romantic Heidelberg. On the plane, my exhausted wife-to-be fell into a deep sleep. I looked over at her slumbering form, and I was hit by an overwhelming feeling of rightness -– that for once in my life, I was in the right place, at the right time, with the right person. In Germany, I learned the wonderful word for ‘significant other’ or ‘sweetheart’: Lebensgefährtin. It literally means a ‘fellow-traveler through life.’ And that’s what we’ve been to one another ever since.” – Dr. Karl Pillemer, author of 30 Lessons For Loving and professor of gerontology at Cornell

4. It was love at first sight — no doubt about it.
“I knew my husband was the one at first sight. I know that sounds crazy, but we were set up and had been talking on the phone for nearly a month. Each time we’d connect by telephone, we’d talk for hours. He knew so much about me before we ever met face-to-face, and before we left dinner that night, we both knew we’d never be with another person again.” – Fawn Weaver, author and founder of Happy Wives Club

5. He was a true gentleman.
“It was a cold night in November 1985 and we were double-dating at a Lebanese restaurant in Washington, D.C. He was NOT my date! I was wearing short sleeves and I must have been shivering because Chuck took off his sweater, a red and green chevron-patterned number, and gave it to me. I slipped it on and it was so soft and smelled so good, musky and manly. We looked at each other, he’s got these see-through blue eyes, and I thought, ‘Hmmm, this could be interesting…’ And it’s been interesting for 27 years.” – Iris Krasnow, author of The Secret Lives of Wives

6. She broke all the dating “rules” for him.
“Lou was bartending over the summer after my freshman year of college and his best friend, who I had dated, was the bouncer. Lou was different from any man I had dated. I can’t really explain what it was, but he complemented me in ways I hadn’t ever considered before. I knew it from the start. And because he wasn’t going to call me (bro code), I looked through the phone book and called everyone with his name until I found him. I don’t believe in rules when it comes to love, but if I did, I was sure willing to break any and all of them.” – Dr. Logan Levkoff, sexologist and author

7. Their chemistry was off the charts.
“I knew my husband was The One on date number four. The electricity wouldn’t stop. I swear, I got electric butterflies every time I would think of him. The PDA was getting a little ridiculous that night and I told him, ‘You’re the man of my dreams.’ He said, ‘Wow, that’s a lot to live up to.’ I was actually trying to NOT be in a relationship for a long time, but there was no denying this intense chemistry.” – Marina Sbrochi, author of Stop Looking for a Husband: Find the Love of Your Life

8. His success was hers too.
“When I whispered to her, ‘They let me in [to a psychotherapy graduate program]’ her face radiated joy. More than I did at the time, she understood what this could mean to me and to us. Up until that moment, the future of my career was vague. She knew that this possibility of me becoming a psychotherapist had my name written all over it. Her assurance made her the one for me.” – Dr. Jim Walkup, licensed marriage and family therapist

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The Classic Relationship Mistake Karrueche Tran Made | OWN

Karrueche Tran tells Iyanla Vanzant what she saw in Chris Brown and why she stayed with him for so many years. Plus, Iyanla identifies the classic relationship mistake Karrueche made.

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3 Wrong Reasons for Getting Into a Relationship

Did you know that there can be wrong reasons for getting into a relationship? Do your relationships generally fail, even though you feel that you’ve done nothing wrong?
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

When Is the Right Time for Sex in a New Relationship?

The start of a new relationship is exciting and exhilarating – you are growing closer and finding out new things about each other all the time. The subject of sex will most likely be going round in the heads of both partners and you will both be thinking “When is the right time for sex?
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

Don’t Get Into A Relationship To Avoid Being Alone – Relationship and Divorce Advice

You need to look after yourself after a major break up / divorce and jumping into a new relationship to avoid being alone is often a big mistake that I see my clients make. Read tips below to handle loneliness and actions to create more happiness in your life.
Relationships:Dating Articles from EzineArticles.com

Five Seemingly Simple Tips for Fostering a (Sometimes) Positive Co-Parenting Relationship

Co-parenting is hard. There is just no other way to describe it. Raising a child is difficult… and doing it with someone you are no longer with, likely for some pretty major reasons, is just… well, hard. I’m pretty sure that while certain aspects of co-parenting may get easier over time, I’m also pretty sure that it never becomes flawless. I mean, what relationship is?

While every co-parenting relationship is different and I’m certainly not a professional expert, there are a few simple key actions in my own co-parenting relationship that I have found make a world of difference… or in some situations, would make a world of difference if they were to happen.

Be friendly when you are all together. It’s inevitable that somewhere along the course of your child’s life, you are all going to have to be in the same location at once. Sporting events, graduations, birthdays, parent-teacher conferences… whatever the occasion, it can make things a lot easier (for you, the co-parent AND your child) to just be friendly in those situations. Say hello to each other. Chat about what you were going to tell them in your next text or email. Maybe even sit together. Let’s be honest… you may rather spend an hour picking up the dog poop in your backyard with a toothpick than hang out with your ex for an hour… but put on an act, fake a smile, whatever you gotta do. I mean, we are all adults here, right? Oh, and this includes stepparents, friends and other family members. Encourage those who are going to be with you to do the same and let them know if you observe otherwise. There is nothing more awkward than the stepparent who makes is super obvious they don’t want to sit anywhere near you… kids are observant and chances are they will notice at some point!

Say thank you. Let’s go back to good ole manners, people. Say thanks… when you ask for a favor and the other parents follows through. When you request a schedule change and the other parents agrees to it. When you call for help because you got stuck in traffic and need the other parent to pick up your child at the last minute. When the other parent changes around their vacation dates so that you can have the dates you prefer. I’m not talking about flowers or a thank you card or a public shout out. A simple verbal “thank you” goes a LONG way. And if you can’t muster up a verbal thanks, send it in a text.

Return phone calls, texts, emails. Even if they don’t require an answer. Text back “ok.” Email back “ok.” Call back and say “ok.” Acknowledge in some quick way that you received their message. Not only is it a good way to make sure that both parties know that the information was received, but it’s just respectful.

Don’t ever tell the other parent that it’s not their business to know that someone besides yourself is watching your child. Now, I’m not saying you need to notify the other parent if you are running out to the store for an hour and your spouse is going to watch your child. That would be ridiculous. I’m not even saying that it’s a requirement to let the other parent know if your spouse or a babysitter is going to regularly be watching your child while you are at work. However, if the other parent asks, just tell them. They have every right to know who their child is with, if he is not with you. If you’re going to say, “it’s not your business,” you might as well also say, “I’m going to belittle your role as a parent to purposefully piss you off and make this co-parenting relationship as difficult as possible.”

Ask their opinion. Even if you don’t need it to make a decision about your child and even if you don’t respect it. Now don’t get me wrong… it’s not a good idea to get yourself into a position where an argument is started because you have different opinions. If it becomes obvious the conversation is headed in that direction, it’s probably best to thank them for their input and get the hell outta Dodge. However, if there are certain aspects of parenting in which you have sole legal rights to make decisions, asking for the other parent’s input can really help foster a positive (or at least a sometimes positive) co-parenting relationship over the course of time.
Divorce – The Huffington Post

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Russell Brand’s New Doc Briefly Addresses Katy Perry Relationship

Katy Perry and Russell Brand have frequently discussed their 14-month marriage since it ended in December of 2011 after Brand sent Perry a text message saying he wanted a divorce. The split was even immortalized onscreen in the 2012 documentary, “Katy Perry: Part of Me,” which featured Perry’s tearful postmortem on their union.

“If you can believe in something great, I feel like you can achieve something great,” Perry said in the film. “I have that same belief system with everything, from career to my life to my personal life, everything. And I will do everything it takes to not fail. And I did everything it took, but it still failed.”

Three years after that movie, the Brand-Perry relationship is back onscreen, albeit briefly. The couple are shown together in “BRAND: A Second Coming,” a new documentary which had its world premiere at the South by Southwest Film Festival on Friday night.

While “BRAND” is much more concerned with its title subject, Perry’s presence is unavoidable. In fact, it’s while Brand is married to Perry that he has a sudden epiphany about fame and his place in the world. The comedian is shown visiting Nairobi, where children are digging through a garbage dump loaded with hypodermic needles and other dangerous refuse; the footage is then juxtaposed with Brand discussing a lavish party he attended with Perry. It’s a turning point that pushes Brand away from his ascension up the Hollywood ladder and toward his current place in the lexicon as a political activist.

The film also includes an interview Brand conducted with Perry while they were married, where the singer expresses some trepidation about their relationship (she tells a story about how the Buddha left his wife to search for enlightenment). But Perry says she “picked” Brand because of how his intelligence made her look. The camera remains on after their chat ends, and Perry stages a faux tantrum while Brand playfully admonishes for pretending to break their possessions. “I control the pussy,” she jokes to someone off-camera. (A representative for Perry did not respond to request for comment when contacted by The Huffington Post.)

katy perry russell brand

Brand has frequently said he enjoyed being married to Perry (“I really enjoyed it,” he said last year), and while “BRAND” doesn’t dwell on their relationship too much, it does include one piece of the comic’s philosophy on human connections.

“I cut people out of my life if I think things aren’t functioning,” Brand says over footage of the 39-year-old visiting his grandmother’s gravesite with his father. “And I think, ‘What am I making this effort for?'”

Brand did not attend the debut screening of “BRAND: A Second Coming,” announcing on Friday that he was “very uncomfortable” watching the film. Neither SXSW Film organizers nor “BRAND” director Ondi Timoner knew of Brand’s decision until hours before the premiere.

This year’s South by Southwest Film Festival runs from March 13 until March 21.
Divorce – The Huffington Post

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8 Regrettable Relationship Mistakes From People Whose Marriages Didn’t Work Out

Nothing prepares you for the next great love of your life quite like reflecting on what went wrong in past relationships. And there’s a wealth of knowledge to be gleaned from the knock-down, drag-out experience of divorce.

Below, divorced writers reflect on the one regret they have about their marriages and explain how it’s made them better equipped for future relationships.

interrupting
“The one thing I would do differently in my marriage is not interrupt. I’m not saying my husband never interrupted me back or that he was this great listener, but I interrupted. Why? I’d like to think it’s not because I am a jerk, but because growing up, I felt I had to fight to get heard. And so I fought for him to hear me and defend myself. Isn’t that the big issue? I got defensive. I didn’t listen. I prepared for my rebuttal. Most of the time, neither of us ‘heard’ each other. Why was I defensive? That’s another layer of the onion. I felt misunderstood by him. I was thin-skinned and fearful of his rejection. I hated disappointing him or anyone. And so I interrupted and petitioned like a lawyer to get him to see my side. To dismantle his anger and bring him back to loving me, in some ways. If I could do it over, I would shut up, listen more — and I mean really listen — instead of preparing a speech and talking.” – Laura Lifshitz, married 5 years

speak
“I couldn’t grasp that conflict is actually a good thing. Prior to and during my marriages, I thought conflict was the worst thing. So I bent myself into a pretzel in my marriage to avoid conflict. I became resentful and upset because I couldn’t express myself and my ex lost respect for me because I didn’t speak my mind. Now I’m speaking my mind all the time and learning to ask questions in ways that the other person has space to think them through and communicate their feelings.” –Bill Lennan, married 10 years

vulnerable
“I locked myself into the role of strong, even-tempered woman in my marriage. I wish I had been more at ease expressing my vulnerability and allowing my ex-husband to witness the ebbs and flows of my strength. Sometimes I didn’t feel strong. Sometimes I didn’t feel calm or even-tempered. Sometimes I wanted to smash my keep-it-togetherness into sharp-edged broken pieces, curl up under the duvet, and be held in comfort. He rarely — if ever — saw this part of me. They were saved for moments of solitude during long business trips. I didn’t allow shards of vulnerability to seep through. He wasn’t often greeted with unabashed warmth and joy when he’d arrive home from the 17 hour flights, face pale, eyes dry and red. I could’ve said I missed him, but rarely did. I had to be The Strong Woman. But that’s not really true. I didn’t have to be. I could’ve been more myself. I could’ve been more vulnerable, expressive, and uninhibited…That’s what real strength is.” -Becky Cavender, married 12 years

getty
“I poured myself into planning a life together right from the beginning. Between the wedding, pushing for a promotion at work and searching for a home, it’s safe to say my stress levels were through the roof. It hindered my focus a little bit and put a strain on us. Looking back, I wish I would have enjoyed the process more. I tried to do too much, too fast and it put a strain on me, on her and on our relationship. I am certain if you ask her, she would say the same thing.

We kind of forgot the reasons why we were getting married. I adored her, but for the first time in our long-term relationship, my focus shifted elsewhere because I wanted to give her a good life. I tried my hardest, but I lost myself a little. Granted, we had a home we would have never imagined we could own, a wedding that was beyond our wildest dreams and great careers that allowed for it all to happen, but we lost sight of each other. So much, in fact, that it tore us apart.” –Anthony D’Ambrosio, married 10 months

pushover
“I am a loving, compassionate person. But I am also vulnerable. I allowed him to convince me I was the problem. Instead, we both were. If I could go back, I would not allow my fear and his passive aggressive nature to fester. I would question why I pulled away. Maybe it wasn’t me. Maybe I should have paid attention to the warning signs he gave me or been more conscious of my fear and self-imposed isolation. As I started to stand up for myself and realize my strength, the dam burst and he exploded. I will learn from the past. I will keep my strength and my voice. I will mother my children and trust my instinct and my heart without reservation and if I ever marry again, I’ll speak up.” –Jenny Kanevsky, married 17 years

inauthentic
“There was a lack of authenticity from the very start. When you’re young, few things are more important to you than the love, acceptance and validation of another. So you seek it at all costs. Even if it means masking who you really are on the inside. Take a lesson from me: Hiding who you really are for the purposes of another’s acceptance is a fool’s errand. An errand that never works out well in the end.

I define authenticity as the daily practice of letting go of who you think you’re supposed to be and embracing who you truly are. Or, as Shakespeare once wrote, ‘This above all: to thine ownself be true.’ Said another way, be yourself. Always. Nothing in life will ever be more important. And that’s a lesson it took me almost forty years to learn.” –Austin Blood, married 12 years

divorce proof
“My parents have been married for 45 years. My ex’s parents, 47. Prior to our own marriage, we believed we’d done all the due diligence. We dated for four years, we lived together, we had careers and pets and traveled. We were on the same page in so many ways, even on our ideas on divorce. We knew it was a reality… just not in our family. We didn’t believe in leaving that door open so neither of us imagined it would ever happen to us.

But life is unpredictable and messy and bad things happen to really good people. We all make mistakes and our futures never ever turn out like we think they will. There is something to be said about having and working toward specific hopes and dreams in life. But when you put blinders on to all other paths, as I did, the fall is so much more painful. Because you’re not just losing a spouse, you’re losing the only future you ever planned on having. This aspect of my divorce has left me more wrecked than any other… it’s falling alone without a rope. If I could go back, I wouldn’t hang all my dreams on one hopeful ideal. I’d also have faith that I’d be OK if life unfolded differently than we’d hoped.” –Shannon Lell, married 8 years

problems fester
“The way I see it, a marriage is like a garden. The more you tend to it, the more it will thrive. Romance is the vitamins and nutrients. Shared values and joined purpose are the soil in which every plant finds purpose and strength to grow and make the most of the opportunity the garden affords. Everything else is weeds: All the jealousies and distractions. All the unresolved misunderstandings that linger past bedtime. All the disagreements over nothing that will ever matter in the long run. All the fights over territory and superiority, and who was right and who was wrong.

There will always be weeds. Every garden has them. But if you can pull them out the moment you spot them, it will reduce the chance for them to spread and grow and bring your garden to its knees. My mistake? I should have paid more attention to the weeds.” –Tom Sturges, married 15 years

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Divorce – The Huffington Post

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Lupe Fiasco Explores Relationship Between Drug Addicted Mother And Son In New Video: Watch

Lupe Fiasco explores relationship between drug addicted mother and her hard working son in ‘Madonna’ video.
News

Your Relationship Doesn’t Stand a Chance Without This

He may be smart and handsome and successful. She may be the best lover you’ve ever had. Maybe he’s your best friend. He cares about your career and goals. She doesn’t roll her eyes when you tell that same joke yet again. He understands why an extra five pounds slays your self-confidence. She just gets you.

There’s so much right about your relationship. But despite all (or some) of his wonderful qualities, why, oh why, isn’t the relationship everything you want? Why are you fundamentally unhappy with her despite moments of bliss? (And, no, you’re not crazy.)

That brings us to the notion of availability. Or lack of, for that matter. Availability in a relationship can take many forms. When you think about having a partner who’s available, you think of someone who’s there for you. When push comes to shove, you’re this person’s priority. So no matter how great this person might be in some regards, it’s often the quality of availability that makes or breaks a meaningful and fulfilling union.

Here are the ways availability is a part of every healthy relationship:

1. Relationally

First and foremost, she/he needs to be free to be in a relationship. Someone who belongs to someone else romantically is not available to you. If you’ve partnered with someone whose true priorities are elsewhere, that’s a problem. For you. Because this amazing, one-in-a-million lover will be MIA when the going gets tough. A relationship based on secrecy and stolen moments is not sustainable. Exciting in the moment? Perhaps. But if you’re looking for a stable partnership — and one you can be proud of — move on to someone who’s relationally available.

2. Emotionally

If your partner can’t access his feelings — or seems indifferent to yours — you’re signing up for relational disaster. You need to talk about your feelings. And you’re also pretty interested in hearing about his. Being partnered with a man of mystery isn’t sexy or exciting, it’s crazy-making. Don’t delude yourself that eventually he’ll open up and you’ll have front row seats to his emotional life. If he’s been conditioned to hold it all in, he’ll continue to do so, making you the sole player in an endless guessing game.

3. Geographically

Your partner also needs to be geographically available or otherwise able to commit to regular face-to-face time. Texting doesn’t count. Do some long-distance relationships work? Yes, of course. But they can take an enormous toll on the folks in them. If she lives far enough away or has a daunting travel schedule that’s an ongoing issue, you need to determine if a part-time relationship is what you want. Are you feeling you don’t deserve more from her? It may be time to figure out why you’re willing to take yourself off the market for someone who isn’t around.

4. Sexually

If this one’s a keeper, he or she is sexually available to you in any number of ways. If
sexual incompatibility is something you’re willing to overlook, you may be ignoring a wildly waving red flag. Does signing up for a lifetime of faking orgasms sound like a good idea to you? Or pledging yourself to a partner who is grossed out by giving you oral sex? Your desire for a satisfying, intimate sex life with your partner doesn’t diminish over time. I’m paraphrasing here, but when sex is good it’s 10 percent of a relationship, but when it’s bad it’s 90 percent. Think about it.

True, no partner is going to get it right every time. But if your mate is systematically unavailable, you’re doing yourself (and your future) a frightening disservice. Ostensibly, you want to be partnered so you can have a partner. And unavailable folks do not good partners make.

If it seems you’re only attracting unavailable partners, do some soul-searching. Are you also unavailable and migrating toward those who share that same quality? If attracting these types seems to be a pattern for you, perhaps it’s time to do some work on yourself with the help of a good therapist.

Remember: You can’t make room for a wonderfully available someone if the seat next to you is taken by an unavailable partner who’s wasting your precious time.
Divorce – The Huffington Post

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‘Mom, I’m Gay, Own a Porn Company, and Am in a Polyamorous Relationship’ (VIDEO)

2015-03-05-1425585011-6228986-BenjamineHeath.jpg

I’m From Driftwood is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit archive for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer stories. New stories are posted on the site every Wednesday.

Coming out once is hard enough. But for Benjamine Heath, he had to come out to his mother three times, once as gay, once as owning a porn company, and once as being in a polyamorous relationship. Benjamine recalls how it all began:

[O]ne time we were having this huge fight, yelling at each other from across the apartment, and at one point she just screams at me, “Are you gay?!” And then I’m like, “Yeah, I’m gay!” And then all of a sudden the conversation just takes a complete 360, and she starts telling me that she’s completely fine with it and then goes into stories about her experimenting with lesbian relationships in college.

Next up, after dodging questions about his work and why he was traveling so much, Benjamine realized it was time to come clean about owning his porn company, CockyBoys:

[E]ventually I was just on the phone with her, and I just told her I work in the adult entertainment business and we own a porn company. And so when I told her, she just asked me the same questions that any concerned mother would. She just wanted to know if I was safe and if it was a supportive environment and just wanted to make sure that I was happy.

Benjamine had one last secret to open up to his mother about: his polyamorous relationship. As it turns out, she already knew:

But she didn’t know that we were in a relationship until last year, actually, when we were out at lunch together with her gay hairstylist friend. They were talking about me like she talks about me a lot to him, and she kind of let slip that I’m the son with the two boyfriends, in a really subtle way. And she didn’t follow it up with any other questions or really say anything else about it, and he just kind of went, “Oh, OK.” And for me it was kind of her just subtle acknowledgement that she knew about my relationship and she was totally fine with it.

His mother surprised him every step of the way and showed her love through acceptance:

[E]very single time I told her, she completely surprised me with her reactions to it, in which she really didn’t react at all. In almost every situation she was just kind of waiting for me to tell her so that she could tell me that it’s OK and she’s just happy that I’m happy.

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A Rare Glimpse Into Oprah and Stedman’s Relationship | The Oprah Winfrey Show | OWN

In 25 years on the air, Oprah says Stedman has only attended three shows – including the final Favorite Things. Watch as he explains why he wants to be there to support Oprah.

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Winfrey provides leadership in programming and attracts superstar talent to join her in primetime, building a global community of like-minded viewers and leading that community to connect on social media and beyond. OWN is a singular destination on cable. Depth with edge. Heart. Star power. Connection. And endless possibilities.

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Oprah Winfrey Network is the first and only network named for, and inspired by, a single iconic leader. Oprah Winfrey’s heart and creative instincts inform the brand — and the magnetism of the channel.

Oprah Winfrey Network is the first and only network named for, and inspired by, a single iconic leader. Oprah Winfrey’s heart and creative instincts inform the brand — and the magnetism of the channel.

Winfrey provides leadership in programming and attracts superstar talent to join her in primetime, building a global community of like-minded viewers and leading that community to connect on social media and beyond. OWN is a singular destination on cable. Depth with edge. Heart. Star power. Connection. And endless possibilities.

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The Question To Ask If You Want A Relationship That Lasts

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By Dr. Phil

We all look at life from our own point of view. It’s human nature. But if you want a successful relationship, you need to try seeing yourself through your partner’s eyes. Think about one very important question: How much fun are you to live with? That may sound silly, but I’m not kidding. Are you fun to be around? How often do you make your partner laugh? Do you tease, play, create positive energy and try to ignite passion?

Robin and I just celebrated our 38th wedding anniversary, and I can tell you that she is fun damn near every day. Since we started dating four decades ago, we’ve been laughing together, reading together, traveling and discovering new music. Then we reminisce about our experiences so we can share them over and over. We’re both having fun. In fact, a few nights ago we found ourselves out in the backyard pool at 1 a.m. I won’t say much, but we were real glad that the lights are timed to go off at midnight!

We also love to tease each other, but it’s never meanspirited. For instance, my knee was killing me the other day, and I was limping into the kitchen when I saw Robin’s reflection in the window. She was walking two feet behind me, imitating the way I was hobbling along. When I caught her, she nearly died laughing, and so did I.

Now, I don’t always have the energy or spirit to be a fun partner. None of us do. But at those times, I can count on Robin to take care of me, and when her spirits are flagging, I do the same for her. Years ago, I had to travel a lot for work. I’d leave on Monday and wouldn’t be back until 4 p.m. Thursday. Robin, who had been alone with the kids all week, could have said, “Welcome home. Now start helping me out around here, buddy.” Instead, she’d meet me at the door with a hug, a kiss and my tennis racquet. She knew I’d be a lot more fun if I could run around and break a good sweat instead of coming in straight from the grind. And we still managed to sit down for dinner as a family by 6p.m.

I’m not saying that marriage should always be like a day at Disney World. Of course the two of you are going to have hard times and issues you need to work through. But if you’re constantly talking about problems, then you’ve got a problem relationship. Show me a partner who’s always bellyaching about bills, housekeeping, the kids, and I’ll show you a partner who isn’t much fun to live with. Say your beloved leaves the toilet seat up, or plays the TV too loud, or falls asleep in his armchair and snores. You can decide to complain about it, or you can decide to find it charming. Either way, it’s a choice.

Don’t let your relationship become like elevator music — something in the background that doesn’t merit your attention — while the days turn into weeks, the weeks turn into months and the months turn into years. There is a very clear formula for success in a relationship: It’s a function of how well it meets the needs of the two people involved, and it’s always based on a solid underlying friendship. You have to discover what your partner needs, and you also have to teach him about what you need instead of expecting him to read your mind. Think of yourself as your partner’s closest companion and playmate. Would you keep hanging out with somebody who just criticizes you and grunts when he runs into you on the way to the bathroom? No way. You’re looking for a person who wants to laugh, talk about interesting things, share stories and grow. You’re looking for a friend. And as the saying goes, if you want to have a good friend, you have to be a good friend.

Dr. Phillip C. McGraw’s daily talk show is in its 13th season. He has written seven best-selling books; his latest is The 20/20 Diet: Turn Your Weight Loss Vision Into Reality.

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Relationship Math: Here’s How to Tell If You’re Putting In Enough Effort

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Here’s Why My Affair Will Turn Into A Healthy, Long-Term Relationship

By Claire for DivorcedMoms.com

Can relationships based on infidelity last?

Had you asked the girl I was nine years ago this question, as I was entering into marriage (and of course having it all figured out at the ripe old age of 21) I would have given you a resounding “NO” and rattled off the reasons I knew to be true.

Of course a relationship founded on lies and secrets could not be healthy. How could you ever expect someone who cheated with you to not cheat ON you? Would you always be suspicious of them and would they be suspicious of you? These reasons of course would lead any rational person to say, “no…there is no circumstance under which an affair can lead to a healthy relationship.”

Fast forward nine years. I am at the end of my marriage, have 3 children, a home, 3 dogs… and while I definitely still have a lot to learn about life, I will say I am nowhere near as jaded as I once was with the illusions of what marriage would be.

We failed at marriage in just about every way possible, all leading up to me saying “enough is enough” when it came to his substance abuse and… in the end… my falling in love with another man. This is about the man (let’s call him 40) that I have fallen head over heels, getting hit by a freight train, madly in love with and whether or not we will be able to translate a relationship started while I was still married into a happy, mutually respectful, healthy relationship. The logical, college educated part of me says absolutely not.

However, let’s just play devil’s advocate here. What if — in spite of the circumstances, and in spite of the underlying potential jealousy issues — we manage to make it work?

And not only make it work but have the kind of love I once thought did not even exist. Does that mean that it is possible to trust someone you know is capable of adultery? I know myself and I know my heart. I know that what I did was not something I should have done. I should have done the brave thing and left my marriage before starting a relationship with someone else. I could have spared more feelings by leaving when I knew I wanted to. But I didn’t. And now I am left with a bit of uncertainty about the future of my relationship with 40.

Adultery is a messy business. I would say to anyone that is considering an affair, in the middle of an affair, or just getting out of an affair, really spend some time looking at the reasons for your actions. I think the answer to whether or not you can make a healthy relationship out of an affair lies in these reasons.

If you were cheating just for the excitement, or just to get back at your spouse for their prior bad acts, the odds are you aren’t looking for a healthy relationship to come out of it anyway. I do think there is an exception though. I think that there are times, such as when your marriage is essentially over, and you are just in limbo mentally and emotionally, when a relationship that begins with an affair can end in a happy relationship.

I know this is not the most popular opinion to hold. Infidelity is typically met with a great deal of opinion and judgment, and very rarely are any exceptions made in regards to how the general public views a “cheater”. But I would suggest, before rushing judgment of the woman you work with or know from your child’s school, that you take a moment to consider what could have led her to have an affair.

You most likely do not know the story of her marriage, and you do not know what sins were committed by both parties. If she does make it work with the man she had an affair with, good for her. Maybe her ex has forgiven her and she has forgiven herself. Maybe she has asked God for forgiveness and she is working to mend that relationship as well.

As for her and her new man, the best they can do is listen to their hearts and trust one another. Here’s hoping the love 40 and I have for one another will be enough to weather the storm we created. I am looking forward to calmer days ahead.

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Khloe Kardashian Admits Relationship With French Montana Was Rushed

Khloe Kardashian has finally shed some light into her on again, off again relationship with artist French Montana, who she began dating shortly after her split from estranged husband Lamar Odom. 

According to Khloe, “It’s nothing against French. I just think I don’t want a boyfriend,” she explained. “I jumped into something because I was just, like, lonely and destructive. But now I’m like, I just want to be alone.”

After admitting that the “Don’t Panic” rapper was highly entertaining, she also revealed that some of his behavior was a bit more harder for her to handle.  She shared, “There’s highs and lows in every relationship…. I have no idea why French calls me 5,000 times a day.”

 

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Mel B Reveals She Had a 4-Year Relationship With a Woman

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Before Mel B married husband Stephen Belafonte, she was in a long relationship with a woman.

“I did have a four-year relationship with a woman,” she told The Guardian. “But I’ve been very happily married for seven years to a penis. Haha! An amazing guy.”

The former Spice Girl’s female love interest happened to be a mom whose children attended the same Los Angeles school as Mel B’s oldest daughter.

This isn’t the first time the “America’s Got Talent” judge, whose real name is Melanie Brown, has admitted to experimenting with the same sex.

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“I’ve definitely not been shy or been one to hold back,” the British recording artist shared. “If I wanted to try something, I did. I had a girlfriend. So what?”

But today, the 39-year-old mother of three insists, she’s a happily married woman.

“No, me and my husband are very tight and solid,” she told the U.K. newspaper. “But I will be the first one to compliment a woman, to say to my husband, ‘Oh, my God, look at her legs’; or ‘Doesn’t she look stunning?’ I do think women are gorgeous. Crazy but gorgeous.”

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An Important Reminder To Not Take Relationship Advice From Your Cat

Cats are great at squeezing into impossibly small spaces, making death-defying jumps, and showing your pet dog who’s boss whenever they get the chance.

They’re not that great at giving relationship cues. Unfortunately, one woman who recently wrote into a vet’s advice column in The Sonoma Valley Sun was not aware of that.

Reader “Picking Up Kitty’s Cues” wrote to Dr. Vallard C. Forsythe and said that she was convinced her husband was cheating on her based on the peculiar behavior of their cat, Muffin Top.

Apparently, while her husband Bill has been clocking in extra hours at work, Muffin Top’s been busy peeing on Bill’s side of the bed — and twice on his laundry. A coincidence? Kitty Cues thinks not.

“My theory is that Muffin Top knows that my husband is lying to me about something and is punishing him,” she writes. “Whey else would it only be HIS cat acting weird and peeing on HIS side of the bed?”

Smartly, Dr. Forsythe does’t venture into the human drama (“I wouldn’t even try to pontificate the answer to that one for all the gold in Fort Knox or backstage passes to an Usher concert.”) But he does offer some sage advice on ol’ Muffin Top’s health — and reminds his readers that our cats are not Iyanla from “Iyanla: Fix My Life”.

“While it is true that animals can often sense things before humans can, it sounds to me like you need to face your marital situation head on rather than let Muffin Top and Cupcake sell you a load of baked goods. Cats are very sensitive to change in the house and when tensions run high, their behavior can change. This can often show up in aberrant urination or defecation. Don’t forget it could also be that one cat has a bladder infection causing him to urinate on the unoccupied side of the bed.”

In other words, sometimes a cat peeing all over your bed is just a cat peeing all over your bed.

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im looking for a nice who likes to enjoys his life, with a sense of humour, i like guys with big personality , someone ambitious and serious and hard working.
my ideal match wouldbe someone a bit diferent than me, but with same interests like fashion, travel, music and others stuffs
I like sexy guys, muscular who know how to handle a woman!

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I'm looking for a serious relationship

About Me

I am easy going,accessible,open-minded, loving, thoughtful.I am not a picky woman.I am quite responsibility to the family.I am dedicated to looking after kids.I am a one man woman who is loyal to marriage. I like music and travel.I have none of any bad habit.

I hope he is easy going too.He is accountable to the family.He is mild temper,patient,loyal,respectful.He enjoys life. He loves me as his lady and knows how to treat her as a lady.He has no bad habit,no family violence.

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What I’m Looking For

I hope he is easy going too.He is accountable to the family.He is mild temper,patient,loyal,respectful.He enjoys life. He loves me as his lady and knows how to treat her as a lady.He has no bad habit,no family violence.

See more of what I am looking for

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A nice and funny guy who is looking for love and for a serious relationship.

About Me

I'm nice girl, 19 years old. I'm looking for a funny guy, who enjoys his life, open minded and tolerant, but funny above all, I love laughing and have fun with friends
Im french but live in England, in London, I like to travel and discover new cultures.
i listening to nice music, going out, cinema, napping, and cuddles!

Read more about me

What I’m Looking For

im looking for a nice who likes to enjoys his life, with a sense of humour, i like guys with big personality , someone ambitious and serious and hard working.
my ideal match wouldbe someone a bit diferent than me, but with same interests like fashion, travel, music and others stuffs
I like sexy guys, muscular who know how to handle a woman!

See more of what I am looking for

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About Me

Am lucia.living in london uk,independent,sensual,Bi lady,into fashion and I also attend part time lectures..ask me to kno more!

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What I’m Looking For

Cool,male of Fem who is romantic,sensual and kno how to touch the right spot….yeah someone who will be true to me and we will share true love and frriendship that will last in our minds forever

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